Whenever I leave loud, odorous traces on everything it's because I just ate chili dogs and drank a bunch of beer milkshakes. However, the Trident Triple Action alarm can do all those things sans gastrointestinal distress.
The alarm sends out a 138 decibel scream, spreads a cloud of traceable dust that is difficult to wash off your skin and clothes, and emits a disgusting odor. The resulting "fun borealis" is enough to distract any would-be thief or haughty parking lot attendant for minutes, if not hours. Apparently, it's great for traveling. Hey jittery sophomores on your semester abroad—What a great way to make great new friends on the Rome subway!