Spike Your Espresso, Literally

For those who need an extra jolt in the morning, this Saeco Etienne Louis espresso machine is happy to oblige. Constructed of steel with aluminum spikes, the sphere actually hides a compartment to heat water, combining form and function brilliantly (kill, caffeinate, repeat).

And while the espresso maker only pumps out one to two cups at a time, your third guest will be too busy crapping their pants to request that you fire up the machine for a second go, and otherwise ruining post-dessert conversation. We don't know how much this beauty costs, but like a trip to the gun store, we don't recommend you attempt the five-finger discount. [product via bornrich]