Gold-Plated Juicer Bleeds Fruit and Wallet Dry

Sometimes a product comes along and bites you on the ass in such a way that you don't know whether to laugh, cry, or take out a loan. This gold-plated kitchen bitch — a snip at 1500 quid (that's over $3,000, exchange-rate fans) is a live enzyme "nutrition extractor" that also works well at extracting money from your bank account and rationality from your person. It also turns the phrase "carat juice" from a spelling mistake into a sad yet viable proposition.

A word from a wise woman: only a tit would splash out $3K on something that ends up smeared in spinach juice. There is also a stainless steel version which will set you back 499 ($1,016) — so that's alright, then (yes, that is sarcasm you can detect in my tone, I'm afraid.) [Be Vital via Gadget Goblin and Red Ferret]