Coffee lovers everywhere should just give up now, the automation of coffee is complete. Scientists have come up with a machine that can taste how good (or swill-like) a cup is, and even sniff out particular types about as well as highly trained human tasters.
Basically, this blasphemous contraption picks up the gas espresso puts out when warmed, and translates the ion combos into frou-frou meatbag descriptions like "roasted, flowery, woody, toffee and acidity." Since it's a European-produced bolt bucket, for now it only tastes ristretto pulls of espresso, but the goal is to use it as a large-scale quality control agent.
Given the cold, ruthless machine that Starbucks has morphed into, I wouldn't be surprised if they dumped their human taste-testers for these things. Everything else is automated at this point, so why not? Embrace (and taste) the machinic mediocrity. [Analytical Chemistry]