I've wanted to be Batman since I was a little kid, but I've never had the billions required to hire Morgan Freeman to construct swollass para-military gear for me to wield an overwhelming advantage over ill-financed and poorly equipped common criminals. So, I'm going to have to settle for projecting my dreams onto my future offspring. Step one: Strap Mattel's Wayne Tech Mega Cape on him from the day he can walk. The wings spring out with a single touch, instantly readying him to fly down a staircase and into the ER. $40, June. Health insurance sold separately.

Damn, I wish they made an adult size. Here's another shot, to get a sense of scale.

[Toy Fair 2008 @ Giz]

Send an email to matt buchanan, the author of this post, at .