Gamer Grub: Because 'Food' Takes Too Long to ChewFor when fruits, veggies, exercise, plenty of sleep and the occasional colonic won't do, Gamer Grub promises to be the first "performance snack formulated especially for gamers." In flavors like Action Pizza, Racing Wasabi, Strategy Chocolate and Sports PB&J, the snacks are not only fortified with vitamins and minerals, but are specially engineered to be crumb and grease free, protecting your keyboard from its normal all-it-can-eat junk food buffet. We're not sure precisely which brick of the USDA food pyramid that videogame genre-flavored morsels fall into, but we're willing to wave most (OK, some) judgment until we're able to test this stuff for ourselves. Until then, here are our rejected headlines for this story:Gamer Grub: Because Playing Games Doesn't Repulse Women Enough Because We've Always Wondered What Mario's Balls Tasted Like Because Vomit Has Nutrients Too Because You're Not Fat Enough Already Because It's Obviously Good For You Because Your Blender Is Broken Because the Rotting Scrapings of the Cheetos Factory Gotta Go Somewhere Because the FDA Takes Bribes Because the Chinese Aren't the Only Ones Trying To Poison Us [GamerGrub via bbGadgets]