Sex In Space: When's Someone Gonna Get Freaky in Zero G?

In his final installment as Gizmodo's cherished Astroblogger, real-life astronaut Leroy Chiao covers the taboo topic of sex in space. Will it happen? Has it happened? Guess you'll have to read to find out...

Has anyone had sex in space? To date, I can tell you emphatically, no. Why am I so sure? It's simple. Guys are guys. If a guy had sex in space, he would not be able to stand not bragging about it. Am I right, or am I right? Sorry to disappoint you, but there it is. We would all know about it. Or, I should say, we will all know about it when it happens.

So, what's the deal? Do we have blow up dolls or robots to take care of business? No, and not that we'd really want such a thing! Humans look a lot better.

Besides, would sex in space—bragging rights aside—really be so great? This week, I've given you a look at the difficulties of doing things in microgravity, and the potential for making some pretty disgusting messes. So, apply all you've learned, and honestly assess whether or not sex would be better up there. You'd have to anchor yourselves, somehow (in all six degrees of freedom), otherwise it would be more than the headboard you might bang up against. And, some objects, while not sharp (we are careful about that), might really hurt to run into during a moment of passion!

So what do we have? What do you think? There is a rule that even alcohol (for drinking) is not allowed onboard, because NASA is worried about bad PR. Can you imagine NASA wanting to address the issue of sex? Ha!

What about the future, as we fly longer and farther into space? That's easy. Crews are already mixed, and crews will become larger. As this happens, there will be a gradual transition from crew to colony (for example, a permanent moon base). Just like in your office now, romances will sprout (which the participants will think are secret) and things will take their natural course.

And, people back on Earth (the guy's friends) will hear about it, almost immediately after it happens. The news will quickly spread from there. And then, you'll know.

People are people, even in space!

Check out astronaut Leroy Chiao's previous illuminating, insightful columns, a centerpiece to our weeklong celebration of human life in space, "Get Me Off This Rock". If you love Leroy as much as we do, you can book him to speak at your business or school, by reaching him at the Leading Authorities Speakers Bureau.