I'm Writing About Whiskey and It's Not Even Tuesday YetS

The first time I saw this bottle of Ballantine's whiskey I thought: I need a drink. Then I looked closely and I thought: Fuck, I need a drink. And some disco dancing too.

Then I looked a third time, and discovered that the animated electro-luminiscent graphic EQ included in its label didn't actually respond to the DJ's antics. It is all automated, a gimmick designed to make it look like the real thing. Lame, Ballantine's. On the other side, I know that—given the quality of music in most clubs and the state of most of their patrons—this won't matter one bit to most of the people immersed in their booze stupor. So. Hookai. Whatever.

I still need that drink, though. But make that a glass of really good whiskey, neat, thank you very much. [Marketing Magazine via Luxist]