uCrown 2 Massage Helmet Is Not a Prop From The Last Starfighter

I can't tell if the OSIM uCrown 2 really is a head massage device, a practical joke, an attempt to reinvent 1980s electronics styling, or some twisted mixture of all three. Also, there was a uCrown 1?

Now, if we're to accept that the head massage functionality as the goal, here's what Brookstone says this $200 piece of kit will deliver:

Air pressure masage
Vibration massage
Magnetic therapy
"Gentle" heat
Built-in speakers

The NES gray color scheme was surely included to give your noggin a healthy "nostalgia massage." Surely. [Brookstone via Coolest Gadgets via DVICE]