The Six Types of iPad Fans and CriticsS

Everybody, it seems, has a damned opinion about this iPad. And since everyone is so happy to tell the internet what that opinion is, it's very easy to fit them all into neat little categories.

The Six Types of iPad Fans and Critics

The Fanboy
This guy will buy anything Apple releases, no matter what, so of course he pre-ordered an iPad as soon as possible. He feels like his entire life has been leading up to buying this product, because it's the most revolutionary thing to ever have been designed by a human being rather than the great creator himself. It changes everything, people! You'll see, you'll all see!

The Six Types of iPad Fans and Critics

The Media Dinosaur
This guy has been working in jounalism since the great depression, and is relying on the iPad to make his business viable again. He doesn't trust Apple one bit, but sees no other options. And hell, even if it doesn't save newspapers, it might keep em alive long enough for him to die before they become completely obsolete.

The Six Types of iPad Fans and Critics

The Mom
The iPad is just so cute and shiny! She saw it on the Today show and it seems like just a fun thing to use to check her email and keep tabs on the kids. She'll have her son order her one when he gets home from college for Easter, as he's the tech-savvy one in the family.

The Six Types of iPad Fans and Critics

The Open Source Fanatic
This guy can not get over his indignation that Apple only allows apps through its own App Store and that he doesn't have access to tinkering under the hood. Everyone who buys an iPad is doing the equivalent of drowning a Linux programmer in a bathtub. INFORMATION WANTS TO BE FREE, YOU SELFISH BASTARDS!

The Six Types of iPad Fans and Critics

The PC Nerd
This guy likes the idea of a tablet, but have you seen the specs on this thing? That processor would've been fast in 2008, maybe! And come on, how about throwing some more RAM in there? Talk about unjustified hype! Have you guys ever heard of these little things called netbooks? They're like half the price for the same specs! This is just another PC form factor, people!

The Six Types of iPad Fans and Critics

The Reluctant Pragmatist
He knows he doesn't really need it. And he's not sure he wants to support Apple's increasingly-skeezy behavior. But making a stand on principled reasons seems dumb when he just wants to surf the web on that thing while pooping. I mean, come on. It's a gadget, why take it so damned seriously?

Mom photo via Flickr user American Virus, used under CC license. All other images used for purely illustrative purposes and are in no way intended to represent direct opinions or quotes, so don't get mad, Lance Ulanoff. Also, Andy Rooney pic used instead of David Carr out of respect for David Carr.