USS Ronald Reagan saves stranded cruise passengers from "starvation"S

Last Monday, the cruise ship Carnival Splendor suffered a fire in the engine room, leaving her stranded 150 nautical miles southwest of San Diego. Thankfully, the Nimitz-class supercarrier USS Ronald Reagan was around and they had lots of extra Spam cans.

Yes, that's right. On top of having to deal with the lack of air conditioning, hot water, cellphone or—even worse—internet access, all those cruise passengers had to eat canned meat instead of stuffing their faces with buffet food! But fear not, humanity, because they also got other essential food supplies like refrigerated crab, the chicken of the seas.

The USS Ronald Reagan was in the area in a training exercise. After receiving a request from the US Coast Guard, the Commander of the United States' Third Fleet gave the order to dispatch 4,500 pounds of food using a HH-60H Sea Hawk helicopter from the Black Knights Helicopter Anti-Submarine Squadron.

Why did they have to divert the USS Ronald Reagan instead of having the cruise company to deal with the situation, is beyond me. It's not like the bloody ship was sinking and I'm sure the passengers could have waited a few more hours for a cargo helicopter to arrive from the shore. Or just wait for the tow ships to arrive while eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches on Wonder Bread.

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The Sea Hawk delivered the precious food and the passengers didn't lose a single ounce from their asses. Hopefully, the US government will charge the company for every one of those Spam cans, water bottles, and refrigerated crab boxes, plus fuel and sailor time. And then multiply the amount by two.

Now, go to sleep. The world is in safe hands. [US Navy and Forbes]