Yeah, you could get longstem roses or pearls or make fancy dinner reservations. But I'm betting that special someone wouldn't mind a little more creativity this holiday season. Here are some offbeat gifts to woo your geeky gal or guy.
1. 8-Bit Dynamic Life Shirt, $18 (each): When this t-shirt is separated from its mate, two and a half 8-bit hearts will glow on its front. But when you're within squeezing difference of your significant other, you're instantly powered up. Assuming she's wearing hers, of course. And if you're flying solo? You can order a special transmitter box to put near whatever inanimate object makes your heart(s) sing. [ThinkGeek]
2. Snuggie Sutra, $10: I'm assuming you already have a Snuggie because, you know, Snuggie. Now it's time to have a little fun with it. Here you and your partner can explore the joys of sleeved-blanket intimacy, including a section devoted to "how to set the Snuggie mood." [Amazon]
3. Interlocking Lego Rings, $125: Another one from the compatible clothing-and-accessories file: two custom-made, hand-cast, sterling silver rings that fit together like Lego bricks. If your relationship can survive the argument over who gets bottom or top, it was meant to be. [Etsy]
4. Better Marriage Blanket, $30 (Twin): If flatulence is taking its toll on your relationship, you've got two choices: plug your nostrils, or invest in the only blanket on the market that employs the "same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons" to dampen the effect of farts. You owe it to her. You owe it to yourself. You owe it to the gods of ridiculous As-Seen-On-TV products. [Better Marriage Blanket]
5. Magnetic Lingerie, $70+: Okay, so underwear held together by flimsy magnets may not be the most practical. But in this day and age, what with its busy schedules and carpal-tunnel finger fumbles, there's something to be said for efficiency. And if you happen to be the one wearing it, well, it beats some generic Maidenform any day. [Jollia]
6. Personalized Romance Novel, $50: Those trembling bodices and quivering loins aren't limited to the Fabios of the world. Just give YourNovel your and your significant others' names, 26 personal details, and choose from a few dozen themes that range from the exotic Rome: Diamonds, Danger and Desire to the sportier Sandhills Fore-Play. Every personalized book can come in "Mild" or "Wild" flavors, and for an extra $25 they'll even throw your picture on the cover. [YourNovel]
7. TwoDaLoo, $1,400: I know. I know! This seems fake. There was even an SNL commercial parody in the 90s that proposed something just like it. But WiseRep insists that this toilet-for-two is real, and goodness knows I want to believe that my loved one and I can stare longingly into each others eyes as we poop our cares away. There's even an "upgraded version" that includes an iPod dock and a 7-inch LCD display. [WiseRep]
The burning sensation that comes from holiday shopping isn't from rubbing against the unwashed masses at malls: It's trying to pick out presents for everybody on your list. Gizmodo's daily gift guides and best gadgets list are the all-natural, non-smelly cure.