A List of Things That Aren't Available in Pantone Colors But Should Be, in No Particular Order

I saw these baseball bats, and though, Wow, Pantone baseball bats, I'd love to smash something up real good with something so sophisticated. But it turns out they're not. Well screw that to hell. They should be, along with these:

Phone chargers
HDMI cables
Roombas
Skittles
Morning after pills
Asthma inhalers
Toupees
Merkins
Braces
Senator Chuck Grassley
Kool-Aid
LulzSec
Condoms
Gaddafi's hat
Javelins
Anti-Vehicle ammunition
Dixie Cups
UAVs
Hurricanes
Fudge?
My pants
Your pants
Ghosts
The movie Hitch
Gaddafi's hat
AT&T bills
Mustaches
Vagisil
Birds
Birch trees
Hillary Clinton's pantsuits
Hillary Clinton's pantry
All of the apartments in Friends
CES
Jay-Z's scented candles
The New York Times
North America
Kate Middleton
Pippa Middleton's ass
Tube top dresses at Forever 21
The changing rooms at Forever 21
Spider eggs
Omelettes
Anthrax
Urine
iPhone 6
Dust
Memories
Guitar picks
Little baby booties
Bar Mitzvah goodie bags
Real Housewives of New York
QR codes
Christmas cookies
The alphabet
Long distance relationships
Lightsabers
Nuclear waste
Pasta strainers


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