Condoms exist in that uncomfortable category of things we accept as part of everyday life, but don't spend too much thinking—much less talking—about. That's silly. To help break the ice, here's a stimulating look at how Trojan condoms are made, because you really shouldn't put anything on your (or your partner's) junk without knowing where it comes from.

The mesmerizing process includes reams of phallic glass molds being dunked into tubs of latex to form the condom, a steel shaft that tests each condom's structural integrity by shooting electricity through it, and still more phalli-rods used to lubricate the rubbers.

The quality control tests look a lot like what would happen if a gaggle of middle school boys got their hands on a few condoms. Blowing them up like balloons, filling them with water, an astonishingly suggestive "roll and knead test." But that belies some pretty amazing metrics. Like, say, 750 percent stretchability. Which I'm sure will totally come in handy for you.

So there you have it. Trojan condoms, brought to you by assembly lines full of metal penises. Isn't technology glorious? [Trojan]