So what's your favorite part about internet sensation and untalented tweeter Rebecca Black's smash single "Friday?" If you said "I think there was a rap interlude in there somewhere that didn't make me die a small death in the most secret parts of my soul," then you're going to love this.
Haha, just kidding, you hate it already.
Above is H.A.P.P.Y. (not an acronym), the new jam from "Friday" producer (and rap interluder!) Patrice Wilson. It takes place the Saturday morning after Friday (I guess?) and its autone has been autotuned. There are many terrible things happening here! Some highlights:
- Patrice Wilson thinks you know/care who he is.
- Patrice Wilson thinks you care that your vocal hatred of "Friday" made him sad.
- Patrice Wilson appears to be dating a 16 year old.
- It's saturday morning and I can't wake up/Can't wake up til 10 am./Had a long night/Had a long night/Yesterday was Friday.
- A cop lets a pretty rapey looking biker dude go free because Patrice Wilson pats him on the back.
- Patrice Wilson on Al Jazeera.
- The one dance move is even worse than the Harvard baseball team's.
- It makes you miss Rebecca Black.
Just to be clear: It's not that anyone would have expected an "official sequel" to "Friday" to have been good in any permutation. But there was a certain joy in Black's total lack of self-awareness. This? This is nothing but.
To happier times: