You might find this hard to believe: not everyone owns an iPhone or one of the several thousand decent Androids for sale or even a Windows phone. Crazy! But what's even more insane is the number of shockingly horrible dumbphones major US carriers are still selling like it's 2006. Here are the worst of the worst.
There's still a need for the cheap phone. Maybe you dropped your smartphone in the toilet and need a loaner. Maybe you can't afford a phone. Maybe you just don't care about phones at all! Maybe you just want something that makes calls and maybe you'll check a webpage or maybe not. In all of these cases, there are swell, completely free phones that you can get from every major carrier. Yes, you need a data plan with those. And yes, we're deep enough into the 21st century that it's worth it.
And then, there's what you find below. A buffet of horrendous hardware, redundant mediocrity, and straight ugliness. Phones that are both bad and not free. Dumbphones that pretend to be Android. Thing thing. Why do they exist? Presumably, because people are buying them—but why are there so many? Why sell ten flavors of ass soup? We don't know, but here's the menu.
Why are these awful phones for sale—some for very much money!—when you can buy phones that aren't awful and cost zero dollars? Corporate apathy, manufacturing antipathy, a large populace of people who will literally walk into a store and buy anything, like molecules bouncing around in a void—all possible. Or there might not be an answer to this question, which is perhaps the most terrifying answer of all.