What Is This Mystery Chinese Card Found In a MacBook Pro Box?

A guy opened his new MacBook Pro box and found this laminated light blue card with Chinese text on the front and back. What is it? A desperate message asking for help? A fortune cookie message?

A MacRumors forum member claims that it is just a Foxconn worker's card, which "basically [reminds the worker of] the working guidelines, follow SOP (standard operating procedure), wear static bracelet, make sure everything is right before changing the shift, etc.."

Do you know what it says? Tell us what it says in the comments.

If you don't know what it says, tell us what it says anyway. I will start:

"1. I've been taken hostage in a horrible lair. There's a big-eyed guy here with leather pants and a whip." [MacRumors Forums]

What Is This Mystery Chinese Card Found In a MacBook Pro Box?