Please remember that your father is not stupid. Every year you buy him a necktie or a hardcover or a worthless trinket for Father's Day—as if he won't notice you bought it at the last second out of desperation. We've got you covered with easy-to-buy gifts that count for more than just the thought.
Your dad knows what he likes. He doesn't need you to fill his house with more crap he doesn't want in the name of some silly holiday that his wife makes him celebrate. Luckily for you, the most useful things in life are usually easy to procure. They're also the types of things he needs and always forgets to actually buy. But if you don't forget to order them, by roughly 5PM EST, you can them shipped on Saturday for just nine bucks.
Being stranded with a dead phone is the worst. You can help your dad avoid this problem with a portable USB juice pack. Plus, these days everyone's likely to have at least two or three gadgets that charge via USB so it'll go even further. The emergency batteries come in many shapes and sizes, but the Duracell Instant Charger is a cheap, tiny option available on Amazon Prime. $25
In the kitchen, there's no substitute for a good, sharp knife. But there you-call-that-a-knife knives, and then there is indestructible, high-carbon German steel, like the Wüsthof Classic six-inch Cook's Knife is available on Amazon Prime. $90
If your dad doesn't own a headlamp (WHAT!?) you will change his life by getting him one. So many new illuminated places. In the event that he already has one, here's a fun fact: You cannot own too many headlamps. Does he have one in his glovebox? In the bathroom? The shed? Headlamps should be mandatory in every room of the house. This inexpensive Black Diamond lamp is available on Amazon Prime. $20
Admittedly, handing your dad a gadget cleaning product is going to be weird. Trust us. When he gets home, he'll actually get around to spraying down his filthy computer screen. It's an incredible feeling—a moment of clarity. The iKlear Complete Cleaning Kit is available for Saturday delivery. $10
Amazon Prime is an awesome deal—and not just because it can help you get your gifts on a Saturday for cheap. Free two-day shipping? YES PLEASE. But sometimes people just can't be convinced of the value of something until they've got it. Do your pops a favor and sign him up for a year's subscription. $80/year