It's not just you—Twitter is completely screwed. From the actual site to mobile apps, every way to send a quippy 140-character message is down. So what are you going to do during this total outage? Panic, probably.
Update 1 12:25pm: The whole thing is so fried, it's cursing at us. Hey Twitter, your code is showing!
Update 2 1:03pm: After an entire hopeless hour, Twitter seems to be back. Return to business as usual.