Lightning Review: Nokia's Review of Its Own Phone

Today, Nokia-employed "staff writer" Adam Fraser published a "review" of the Nokia Lumia 620 on Nokia's Conversations blog. That's confusing! So we thought we could help clear things up by reviewing his review.

What Is It?

Close to a thousand words about Nokia's cheapest Windows Phone 8 handset, written by a blogger hired by Nokia to write about Nokia products on a Nokia blog.

Who's It For?

People Googling the Internet wondering whether the Nokia Lumia 620 is a piece of junk.

Design

The layout of the review makes for easy reading, with three photos illustrating how the handset is "compact, vibrant, and lots of fun."

Using It

The post is designed to be read as an expert review of a smartphone, aimed at helping consumers make informed purchasing decisions. It contains ample Nokia fawning cloaked in your standard gadget writer tropes, so it's easy to confuse this public relations flackery as a real review.

The Best Part

Fraser's unbridled enthusiasm for a product he has been paid to write positive things about:

Tragic Flaw

No matter how earnest he sounds, he works for Nokia. It's like Coke saying Coke Zero is a really good soda, or Communism getting five stars from Mao.

This Is Weird...

Nokia reviewed its own phone? Also this part of the review about a dark alley:

Right now, I'm loving the Cinemagraph app. Here's my first attempt, down a dark alley

Lightning Review: Nokia's Review of Its Own PhoneS

What are you doing in a dark alley?

Test Notes

  • Read for about 10 minutes at my desk shortly after the review was published.
  • The review did not convince me that purchasing the phone was a good idea.
  • These passages say basically everything you need to know:

    Worth noting that you only get on of these shells inbox, the others have to be bought separately. I got all of them as a special delivery from Helsinki!

    Dual-shot is the term we're using to describe the blending of our CMYK palette to create new and exciting colours. For example, for the glossy lime we used a yellow polycarbonate base colour and overlaid it with a transparent cyan one. From the front, you'll see a double layer of colours, but from any other angle, all you can see is a vibrant, luscious lime colour.

    As is usual with any new phone, there's a brief process of selecting times and dates, as well as the option to sign in to your Microsoft account, something you'll need if you want to purchase any of the over 125,000 apps or games available on the Windows Phone Store.

Should You Buy It?

Don't buy a word that comes out of Adam Fraser's mouth. As for the phone? You probably shouldn't buy that either.

"Compact, vibrant, and lots of fun: our Nokia Lumia 620 review"

• Words: 936
• Images: 6, full color
• Screen: 921,000 dot, three-inch AMOLED
Gizrank: 2