Buy This Watch Because Features

If your watch has perpetual oyster movement, tells time in five zones, doubles as a Swiss Army Knife, slice and dices Julianne fries, speaks German and Swahili, and can survive a dunk in the Marianas trench but you don't use those "features" daily, congrats! You're a sucker for marketing.

Buy This Watch Because Features

[This Isn't Happiness]