And don't worry. If you don't, you can take a quick 360-degree virtual tour up top thanks to this beautiful Gizmodo post.
One: Just hold it
When you finally lift the One from it's packaging, stop for a second to take in its design. HTC is really touting its aluminum zero-gap construction here, each handset having endured two hundred minutes of CNC machining to produce what you're holding right now. The delicate, ergonomic curve. The diamond-cut chamfered edges. It's thin, light, and a pleasure to hold.
Sitting atop this chassis is a formidable 4.7-inch Super LCD 3 display under Gorilla Glass 2. A quick turn over in your hands (or in the 360 image above) will show you everything you need: the power button, audio jack, volume rocker, twin speaker grilles, micro-USB port, a 2.1MP front-facing camera, and the 4MP UltraPixel camera module in the back.
And don't forget the USB cable, power adapter, and earbuds back in the box!
Two: Get started
When you turn on the One, you'll be greeted by its welcoming chime — a surprisingly loud welcoming chime. You'd be forgiven if you wanted to turn it down, simply because you're just not used to a phone having that much aural presence right out of the box. It's the HTC One's BoomSound that's providing you with dual front-facing stereo speakers with built-in amplifiers so you get a fuller, richer sound.
From there, you'll be obliged to enter your Google and AT&T account information.
Good. Now. The One is running Android Jelly Bean 4.1.2 with HTC Sense 5. That translates to a rather close-to-stock Android experience with a few amenities. Like BlinkFeed, which aggregates news from your social accounts and partner outlets like your own built-in newspaper.
Lining the bottom of the display are your phone, messaging, browser, and camera apps, as well as the app drawer. An app drawer you probably want to start filling up with your favorite apps right about now.
Three: Feel the power
Hop into the Google Play store and download a few of your favorite apps. Take your time, there's a lot going on in there. While exploring, you may have noticed two things: first, the screen is incredibly clear and crisp, with nary a pixel in sight. That's because the 4.7-inch display is pushing 1080p HD with 468 pixels-per-inch. That's...yeah, that's an insane amount of pixels. Second, everything you're trying to do, be it browsing or gaming, is running buttery smooth. You can thank the Snapdragon 600 processor under the hood with 2GB of RAM. And don't worry about running low on space too quickly. You have, at the least, 32GB of storage with an option for 64GB.
Four: Get out there
By this point, you're just about set up, so you'll want to head out into the world to greet the day and high-five your bros about scoring this new phone. Avoid high-fiving anyone with the phone. That might hurt you your bros, or the phone.
While you're out and about, you'll be connected to AT&T's fast 4G LTE network. You also get the requisite cadre of radios, including WiFi, Bluetooth 4.0, and NFC. You can also count on the One's 2,300mAh battery to last you about a full day with moderate use. And when you bring your buddies back home, you can use the One as a universal remote via Miracast.
And you can use those headphones you got (remember?) to enjoy that sweet Beats Audio. Just in case you want to zone out for a bit.
Oh, last thing...
Five: Break out the camera
The HTC One relies on ultrapixels to achieve its photos. UltraPixels, which truly means larger megapixels, capture 300 percent more light than pixels produced by competing smartphones. That means more information to improve your photos and less struggling to find the right light for your shot, even in low light.
Or! You can take a Zoe, which is a whole new take on the photo gallery. Just by pressing the shutter, the One will take 20 images and a 3 second video, all of which you can share with whomever you want via email, SMS, Facebook, and more through HTC's Zoe Share service.
And that's all you need. Really — this is all proof that the HTC One is everything your phone isn't. Now go. You've learned well, young one. And be sure to check out everything HTC has to offer right here.