7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

ReaganBook—the hip, social-networkin' conservative's answer to Facebook that popped up not even a week ago—is dead. After being flooded with pornography and profanities of all sorts, the "Facebook for Patriots" was forced to shutter its doors. But don't worry. There are still plenty of places where the internet-minded neocons among us can feel right at home.

Here are some of the internet's foremost conservative alternatives to all your favorite websites. Know any we missed? Let us know down below, comrade.


Instead of Wikipedia: Conservapedia

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: The trustworthy encyclopedia.

Highlights: Essentially everything in the "popular pages" list is worth reading. But in particular, we recommend "Barack Hussein Obama," "Homosexuality," "Worst College Majors," "Evolution Liberalism, Atheism, and Irrationality," and last but certainly not least, "Liberalism and Beastiality." There is a lot about beastiality.


Instead of OkCupid: The Atlasphere

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: Connecting admirers of The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged.

Highlights: This dating bio:

You should contact me if you are a skinny woman. If your words are a meaningful progression of concepts rather than a series of vocalizations induced by your spinal cord for the purpose of complementing my tone of voice. If you've seen the meatbot, the walking automaton, the pod-people, the dense, glazy-eyed substrate through which living organisms such as myself must escape to reach air and sunlight. If you've realized that if speech is to be regarded as a cognitive function, technically they aren't speaking, and you don't have to listen.

Also this one:

Please note: If you're overweight, I won't date you. If you believe in God, I won't date you. If you vote for Democrats, I won't date you.


Instead of Facebook: Tea Party Community

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: The Tea Party Community is a conservative hub for sharing ideas, unifying a movement and organizing strategies to keep the United States of America in her rightful place as the greatest nation on earth. "We The People - Don't Tread on US!"

Highlights: The ads:

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites


Instead of Reddit: Ritely

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: News for conservatives, news done right.

Highlight:

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites


Instead of The Onion: The People's Cube

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: We cure weak liberalism with strong communism.

Highlight:

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites


Instead of Snopes: Conservative Fact Check

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: CFC is dedicated to providing a conservative alternative to enormously liberal-biased fact checking sites like snopes.com, factcheck.org, and politifact.com.

Highlights: All the #facts.

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites


Instead of Gmail: Reagan Mail

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: The official email provider of the conservative movement.™

Highlight: For the low, low price of $40 a month, you can "help restore President Ronald Reagan's America."


Instead of the AARP: AMAC

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Tagline: Better for You. Better for America.

Highlights: Pretty much every magazine cover.

7 Conservative Alternatives to the Internet's Most Popular Sites

Art by Sam Woolley