Downtown Los Angeles, a city that human beings choose to live in (Image: Matt Novak, an idiot who chooses to live there)

I need to get out of this fucking city. Los Angeles is just too damn expensive. I don’t know what I’m doing here anymore. The only thing worth doing that’s free is the library. Oh, that and playing air guitar at Whole Foods. Sorry, it’s 365-Foods or whatever it’s fucking called. You didn’t hear? That new Silver Lake grocery store has free air guitars. Because that’ll help offset your rent.

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From The Independent (emphasis all mine):

The Silver Lake site was swarmed on its opening day and, a week later, finding a spot in the car-park is still no easier than finding pre-spiralised zucchini at Safeway. The first indication that 365 is aimed squarely at millennials sits just outside the entrance: an empty rack offering “free air guitars” and directing customers to a specially curated Spotify playlist, peopled with such fashionable-yet-inoffensive artists as LCD Soundsystem, Bon Iver and TV on the Radio.

One more time in case you missed it:

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The first indication that 365 is aimed squarely at millennials sits just outside the entrance: an empty rack offering “free air guitars”

And one more time for good luck:

an empty rack offering “free air guitars”

Reading that makes me want to club something cute and furry and vulnerable to bits with a blunt object.

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Why do we live in this city? Okay, yes, I sincerely love the fact that I can see an old movie on the big screen any night of the week at the New Beverly, the Aero, the Egyptian, or on a rooftop downtown. And I sincerely love the library. It really is a world-class public library. Fuck, I just remembered that I owe like six bucks to the library in late fees. I better get my ass down to 365 before they run out of air guitars. I bet they start charging for them on Monday.