Season two of House of Cards has officially been out for a little over 80 hours, meaning you've probably already gorged yourself on all thirteen episodes. (WARNING: Some [non-critical] spoilers lie ahead.) The best worst part? An Anonymous-style hacker and his faithful sidekick, Cashew the guinea pig—every single second of which was absolutely, phenomenally over-the-top ridiculous.

Pretty much every computer nerd/hacker stereotype manages to make its way in. A penchant for pulsing, abrasive techno at unreasonable volumes? Check. Monster display setup with streams of code a la The Matrix? Check. Quirky animal friend? Check. A demeanor equally creepy, pompous, and paranoid? Check, check, and... check.

It's baffling to think that, even today, writers of what may be the best show on (sort-of) television are still resorting to this absurd archetype of the hacker evil genius. But even more baffling? How the hacker's page up key somehow controls every single function on every single computer program.

Supercut courtesy of our very own Nick Stango.