When pressed for details, they kept repeating their mantra about laser being the "purest light source," but from what we could see, we think it must have something to do with hot-looking dancing girls, frickin' lasers, smoke and maybe even mirrors. We were taking shots of the TVs, but all these women kept getting in our way. Oh, well.

Be sure not to miss the rest of the photos in the set at the I4U site. [I4U News]

Hey wait a minute, didn't we meet this girl at the blackjack tables at the Imperial Palace last January? [I4U News]

Kangaroo-like? I got yer joey, right here. [Techie Diva]

Other babes of historical importance were also mentioned, such as Marilyn Monroe (pictured at left), with a target ratio of 0.69, making it almost to the level of perfection of Jessica, but not quite. This 0.7 ratio translates into a waist of 25 inches and 36-inch hips, making that tick-tock walk look absolutely perfect. But the ratio is not necessarily related to measurements or weight—just the difference between those two measurements. However, we're betting that if those numbers get a whole lot larger, the illusion is lost.

Other possessors of that magic 0.7 ratio: Sophia Loren, Alessandra Ambrosio and Venus de Milo.

From Wikipedia:

A WHR of 0.7 for women and 0.9 for men have been shown to correlate strongly with general health and fertility. Scientists have discovered that the waist-hip ratio (WHR) is a significant factor in judging female attractiveness. Women with a 0.7 WHR are usually rated as more attractive by men from European cultures.

The Bionic Woman series premiere is September 26, 9pm/8 Central on NBC. [NBC]

Thalon Design likes to play games with car mods, and it's outdone itself with this one. Another pic of this shapely young lady falling all over this transmogrified car, after the jump.

It's a test concept, but this could be just striking enough to make it to market. If that sleek young filly comes along with it, we're in. – Charlie White

The Smart Eleanor [Thalon Design, via Autoblog and Jalopnik]

So here they are, the current Queens of the Silicon Age, straight from the city with the cleanest airport floor we've ever seen: Taipei, Taiwan. Check out the gallery for pictures of babes, plus a gratuitous shot we took of that oh-so-clean floor, just to make us feel a little more pure, clean-cut and innocent. – Charlie White

To the Gallery!

Click on an object in the scene, and then she sashays over, picks it up and drops it in the toilet, ready for you to flush. We especially like the way she giggles and asks you to "stop tickling" her when you mouse over her cuteness.

The point of all this? Kohler Class Five technology needs very little water to flush down even the biggest pinched loaves. That fancy toilet still has a hard time with that rubber ducky, though. – Charlie White

Jo wants to meet your friends [Kohler, via Neatorama]

Girls Who Play [gamerhelp, via CrunchGear]

Today, CeBIT 2007 closes its doors for another year. And so, as the exhibitors pack up their electric lederhosen, telepathic computers, and Wi-Fi trouser presses and roll onto the next trade fair, we salute the unspoken heroines of the week-long gadgetstravaganza. Yes, the booth laydeez.

Normally Giz's resident laydeeologists, erudite, intellectual types such as Charlie, Jason, or Louis, give their views on these hostesses with the mostess, but they don't seem to be around (I did shout "Wakey Wakey, Hands Off Snakey" into the Gizmodo lair but my words echoed eerily around the office). So this time your laydee commentary is going to be done by someone who knows about them better than anyone else on the team—Ad—and that's because I am one.

So you can forget about any "Look at the peripherals on that"-style comments, and instead concentrate on the whole package. There's a gallery there for those of you who lost the power of speech when you fixated on the four laydeez above, and if anyone else wants to join me after the jump, I'm the one in the tangerine leisurewear and turquoise eyeshadow.

We've done the Good (four of them, actually), so let's tackle the Bad. Now then, girl on the left, you are Not Bad. Don't get me wrong, you are Good. I like the way you mix business with pleasure. The top-half combo of orange neckerchief and round-necked jersey says, "I am businesslike, I have been fully briefed on the product that I am selling, although personally I prefer Sony Ericsson, I am an IT student at Leipzig University, I am just doing this to pay the bills and no, you can't have my telephone number" —while the bottom half shrieks (in a dignified, New Germany kind of way, you understand) a completely different message.

Shall I translate it for you? "Hello, techie journalist," it is saying. "Yes, you can come and pretend to talk to me about Nokia whilst admiring the endless trajectory of my slightly-tanned-but-not-too-much-as-I-don't-want-them-to-match-my-skirt legs. But that, sir is totally out of the question." She's a good booth babe, despite the fact that her expression is less come-hither but more go-fuck-yourself. Well, after six days of techie journalists, wouldn't you?

I like her, it's her two friends I'm not so sure about. Yep, the two dressed up as nylon policemen, who look like they have been out on the lash all night, the last two girls from the bachelorette party who got lost on their way to the airport and have been trawling around Hanover for the past three weeks trying to raise enough money to get another flight home and are really pissed because they missed spring break and German guys are no fun at all and, Candice, you're not listening to me, just stop staring at the journalist, you can't think he's hot, oh, you think he can help us get back to Cincinnati before my mom finds out that I stole her nylon jumpsuit with the open crotch that she wears whenever she gets to the second date?

I know that there is something about chicks in uniform that guys dig. I accept that (I must admit, I get warm and nostalgic just thinking about Rosa Klebb and her spiked shoes in From Russia With Love), but there are ways of doing it. Just see the gallery—bare tummies and expressions that scream, "Ooh, you have been a naughty boy and I am going to have to arrest you and take down your particulars." But a smelly all-in-one boilersuit is just wrong.

And finally, to the Ugly. Oh Memory Corp, what were you thinking? That a smorgasbord of nipples, leg warmers, heinous sewing box-cum-handbag, full-body Hammer House Of Horror makeup, pastel pink aerobics trainers, Louis XV wig and motorbike parked in the background will bring people running to your stand? I suppose it depends where the stand is. I mean, if you were exhibiting in a high-security loony bin then yes, you would have a stampede.

And another thing. With a creature like that fronting your product, you'd better be selling something that wipes memory. Completely, or the CeBit hacks will be complaining of recurring nighmares in which a French Fop made from Cotton Candy tries to run them down on his motorbike to the sounds of Olivia Newton John's (Let's Get) Physical. And you do not, my friends, want your product associated with that. – Ad Dugdale

CeBit 2007 Girls [TechPowerUp!]

It turns out every guy in the convention center wanted to test out his own personal equipment on the Samsung jungle set, taking those pics home for later, uh, use. So with apologies in advance to women's and animal rights groups, and with our apologies to our heathen gods for all the evil things we want to do to this young leopardess/temptress, we offer you this first photo, with the promise of many more-revealing ones after the jump (definitely NSFW):

Hey, what would the caption be for this one?

Take a gawk at the picture gallery below, which is certainly not safe for work:

Fat Tuesday is the day before Ash Wednesday and the last hurrah before the start of Lent. This day has a lot of significance throughout the world, but for us in the United States, it is just another day where we can get absolutely plastered.

Fat Tuesday is also synonymous with the viewing of breasts in exchange for reward, in most cases, beads. So, what is a better way to ring in Fat Tuesday than a grand ol' list of some of our favorite alcohol- and breast-related gear. Jump to see the entire, possibly NSFW, list.

10. Godzilla Beer Dispenser
I wouldn't suggest drinking directly from this beer-dispensing Godzilla, because then it would appear that you and Godzilla's relationship was more than professional. This little dino lets out a mighty roar upon pouring of a beverage (although, like most dinosaurs, Godzilla prefers beer).

9. Bikini Babe Case Mod
Nothing gets my blood boiling more than a bikini babe and powerhouse computer combined into one sick project. This guy hand-crafted a computer to look like a female of an anime variety.

8. Breast Shaper
Ladies, or well-endowed guys: You may want to get those breasts in shape before flaunting them around the town for beads, and this strange contraption may be able to do so. The Bust Doctor can reshape breasts. Maybe it can reshape the breasts into animal and other cool figures.

7. Beer Tap Backpack
I know it differs from town to town, but in my neck of the woods the general bar district comes together for one giant celebration, so traveling from bar to bar is generally encouraged. The Beer Tap Backpack will ease those painful 20-foot drinkless walks to the next bar.

6. iBreath iPod Breathalyzer Accessory
What kind of a Gizmodo list would this be without some sort of an iPod accessory? The iBreath attaches to the bottom of the iPod and can give a BAC quicker than your 80s rock playlist can load.

5. Boobie Mouse Pad
Always a classic is the boobie mouse pad. No further explanation needed.

4. Boob Radio
Tweaking the left nipple adjusts volume and tweaking the right nipple selects a station. Now that is a useful pair of breasts.

3. Breast-Shaped Shampoo Dispenser
Not to be outdone by the boob radio is this boob shampoo dispenser for the shower.

2. Asahi Beer Robot
I'm pretty confident there is not a single person on this planet who would not want to own a beer-pouring robot like this one. The robot doesn't do the greatest job pouring, but we aren't picky.

1. Boobkini
The Japanese are the reigning kings of boobs and this invention further proves it. Just watch the video.

And with that... Happy Fat Tuesday, all. However you feel like celebrating (whether it be drinking yourself stupid, staying in, or treating it like any other Tuesday) may it be enjoyable. And if you do decide to go out drinking, do it safely. Hand off the keys and do as my mother always tells me: look, but don't touch. –Travis Hudson

Practice Safe Phone with Skins Cell Phone Condoms [JLDL]

It's a bit disconcerting that this device looks vaguely like the yokes worn by a team of oxen, but it also reminds us of that old "Bone Phone" (anybody remember that?) from years gone by. Even so, the Sqush could probably put the kibosh on whatever pain you suffer, offering blessed relief for the bargain price of $19.99.

Speaking of bones, isn't the Sqush getting perilously close to an erogenous zone or two in that picture above? Perhaps the ladies might even consider slipping the vibrating massager between the legs for a little ride 'em horsey action. A versatile device, indeed. – Charlie White

Sqush Neck Massager [ubergizmo]

Update: This lack of sleep is killing me. I forgot to the link. See below for babeage.

CES Babe Gallery

Update 2: Now the Zoomr link above is busted. Hold on while I go reconnect the Intertubes. Here, look at the galleries below while I am un-exploding the Internet.
TweakTown Babe Gallery
ThinkComputers Babe Gallery

Jump for a hot-tub frolicking video and more-detailed pics of the entire process, as well as underwater proof that the Skins actually work.

Skins can also keep that small electronic device protected from sand, dirt, grime, and any other liquids, too. – Charlie White

Product Page [Innovalife]

Wait. It gets even better! Alas, Babe-a-lonia:

Cali Lewis, Geekbrief TV

Veronica Belmont, producer of CNet Buzz out Loud and co-host of CNet TV and Crave

Jessamy Hawley from Gadget Candy

Katie Lee from Shiny Shiny

DC blogger Jessica Cutler

Rocketboom's Joanne Colan

Karina Stenquist of Mobuzz TV

Ana Marie Cox - former Wonkette editor, now Washington editor of Time.com

Singaporian blogger Wendy Cheng, also known as Xiaxue

Who's your fave? – Charlie White

After the jump, check out just a few of the innovations and prototypes we found, turning the planet upside-down in a way that's certain to lure scads more babes to the Giz, ready and hot to see what's next in our groundbreaking women's research project.

Okay, okay, so now that we've taken care of that, where are the Gizmodo groupies? Where, oh where? What will it take, ladies? – Charlie White

UPDATE: Worth1000.com is the originator of these brilliant graphics, part of a series of Photoshop contests entitled "If Women Ruled." [Worth1000.com, via SixWise] (Thanks, Denise!)

Yep, it's got it all. Close yourself up in this baby with just your head sticking out, and emerge a while later feeling good as new. Looks like some good clean fun. – Charlie White

Product Page [NeoQi, via Born Rich]

We'd rather get up close and personal with that babe wearing the bra, lovely supermodel Karolina Kurvoka, than the absurd garment itself. But if you find yourself coming up short of cash for one of these bejeweled brassieres this Christmas, perhaps that $1.89 million solid gold bra would be more in your price range. – Charlie White

Like this bra? Snap it up for just $6.5M [USA Today, via BornRich]

Each one of the tiles can have a solar cell and an RGB LED embedded, so various lighting patterns can be displayed on the dress. You light up my life, baby—let me stand next to your fire. – Charlie White

Solar-powered dress [we make money not art]

It can't be comfortable; look at how it's digging into her. Miss, I'm on a humanitarian mission—here, let me help you out of that. – Charlie White

$1.89 Million Gold Brassiere Hits The Ramp [BornRich]

How could we resist telling you a story that involves dope and babes all in the same breath? There is a legitimate use for the cannabis sativa plant, and that is to make hemp to be used for clothing. But the plant's course coarse fibers have been sometimes associated with cloth that is anything but smooth and silky.

Now British clothier Enamore has figured out how to mix up the fibers from the hemp plant with silk and other recycled fibers to put together some soft and supple underthings worn by this pouty-lipped vixen. Only problem is, while underwear like this is certainly smoking, it must be hard to keep it lit. – Charlie White

Luxurious Hemp and Silk Lingerie From Enamore [Treehugger]

"Become a part of a world-spanning campaign and watch the uncovering of our model on our website. The more stones are sold, the more will be visible of the Million Crystal Body!"

Product Page [Million Crystal Body, via Shiny Shiny]

We're showing you this modified PC with only the best of intentions. In fact, we worship the female form. Heck, some of us are actual females in real life!

Kat's Land [via iZ reloaded]