These are probably the best Star Wars toys ever to grace the galaxy: Stormtrooper-fried Skywalker relatives, the energy that bind us all together (aka The Force. Or Mike), a few rocks left from Miss Purty Princess Danish Pastries' adoptive planet or, my all-time favorite, the only good Ewok (is a Dead Dead Ewok.) And yes, while these toys are not real, the concepts are ripe for the making, hopefully including their made-up descriptions on the box:

The Planet Alderaan
It's just a box of rocks... yes, it's the Planet Alderaan. Post-destruction, the play value of this toy was somewhat diminished.
Or the one found in the Smouldering Moisture Farm Playset: "Re-create the moisture farm massacre—Luke's aunt and uncle killed by Imperial Stormtroopers all over again!!! Burning corpses sold separately." Evaporate that, Uncle Owen. One more thing, McMorran, the guy who did this? A genius. [McMorranNeatorama]












Comments
Funny, the poor design and layout of the Gizmodo page put the Apple ad on top of pictures of the star wars characters. So the star wars figures that didn't make the cut were the mac and pc guy :)
Can't you guys buy a web design for dummies book and fix the site design?
It sure would be nice if I could see these. Unfortunately 2 of them are covered up by the GIANT APPLE AD.
the stupid mac ad is covering the last one.
right click on it and choose view image (firefox even displays wrong with adblock
I hate Macs, they ruin everything....
why must i constantly encounter ad in my way problems on giz. the camera adds, the staples adds last week, now apple...sheesh
and we have... aunt beru, the force, and the pc and mac guy!!
would have been weird seeing the pc and mac guy in the star wars movies
that explains it! mine was covered by a white square. adblock ftw.
The stupid giant white box with nothing in it is obscuring my reading pleasure. Fix it immediately or i will suffer irreversible mental anguish and my life will be a hollow shell of its former self.
Wow.
That ad really did diminish the experience.
I'm going to go and sit quietly for a little bit.
Through the magic of copy and paste (effort not entirely necessary...) I have discovered the remaining artifact to be a Dead Ewok... (A ball of fur..)
This is unfortunate for me mainly since I love those little 'hair balls' and I seemed to have gone through the effort of finding that last figure...
I'm glad I'm not seeing an ad anywhere.
I'll take two of the force action figures.
Step1: Make people click comments to find the link
Step2: Put more ads in the comments (the more obnoxious the better)
Step3: Profit
Seems like you guys are doing this more and more lately (also see clicking imaginary flash player to play a video). Is there some internal directive to do this?
No wonder people use adblock...
I wanted to see the crazy ads, but I couldn't. I have went on such an anti-ad extravaganza on my system that even when I opened the page in IE I couldn't see the ads. I don't even know what I set up to block them in that pile of crap. Now to see if I can see them in a VM.
Has everyone gone nuts? The only reason to go online these days is for the adverTAINMENT. Sheesh. That last Mac ad was HIlARious!
I was peeing my pants, too funny how the PC guy acts like a real PC and the mac guy is too hip for his own good. Man oh MAn that is funny shite.
PS ;)
chillax guys. I'm pretty sure I read on the site that the authors get paid on popularity of the article based on page views. how else are you going to track that? it's the nature of the beast. I enjoy reading the snarkiness of Giz...and refreshing 5000 times/day to see if there's a new article posted.
I deal with it because at least these guys get paid with the ads that are posted. Better that than have to pay to read Giz(like Salon).....did I just really say that?!
Please don't make us pay.
I felt a disturbance in the force. It's as if a billion voices suddenly cried out and then were silenced by the Mac and PC guys!
Don't like the ads? Get Firefox and AdBlock Plus. You have to block the image and block the frame to avoid seeing that giant ad block the blocks images like that. It got really annoying and I searched for a solution. Now I'm about 98% ad-free on most sites. =-]
I feel something terrible has happened as well.
-but not to me! Adblock FTW!
The force? everone knows you cant bottle that!!!
Hey, TFSU! It's Jesús Díaz, Apple goes first!!
I also miss the dismantled C3-PO that Chewwie wears in his back in ESB.
@BigDanInTX: ORLY? I can block the ads? Wow, that is teh awesomeness!
I am at work using IE6 (no!), they don't let us install programs on our computers, so I'm stuck with the crap that they give us. Can't block ads.
That is so awesome.
A thousand voices cried out -- and the ads were suddenly silenced.
@Jasoncscs: sure it was funny...that's why i don't block them...but better coding please!
i think i know the problem...the web designers have ad block on when they code :P
@Jeff_McAwesome:
How about the hosts file?
[www.everythingisnt.com]
As long as your IT department isn't totally gestapo-esque, you should be able to get away with this.
@impliedsurprise: It's called RSS. ;)
How about the "brother and sister incest kiss" action figures?
@Pope John Peeps II: That would be more of a statuette, because you could easily just make your regular action figure kiss.
You do know that without ads there is no Gizmodo right? Unless you have some method of monetising the internet that web gurus around the world have yet to stumble on, just live with it and stop complaining about something that you get FOR FREE on a daily basis.
Did they ever make an original Jabba figure?
@Gizmo: can you explain to me why in the remastered episodes jabba is the size on solo, then like 5 times the size of the hottie princess?
@EMoShunz: When he eats, it is not just his belly that grows... Leah came along in his fatter middle-age, you know, when he started wearing spandex.
Also, what's up with Yoda and the comb-over?
@Windhawk: ahhh...makes sense.
damb she was hot in that.
need to get wifey that outfit for my christmas present
@Gizmo:
I have no problem with ads and don't run any ad blockig at home and am happy to click on ads to give support to sites. However I don't support intrusive ads, ones that feel the need to overlap content, need some silly plug in to be installed, etc. if sites keep the ads reasonable then we all get long nicely.
@enine: agreed
My word but y'all are a bunch of whiny bitches...why don,t you just run Firefox with adblock+ fortified with Filterset G? I have yet to have one of these ads even show up on my screen let alone screw up content.
Ad revenue fuels this site. Nifty ads like this one aren't all that bad, and you have to admit its kinda funny, what with Vista sucking hard and all.
Apple lover or hater, John Hodgeman is hilarious and a perfect choice for the Windows guy. Better than that jackass playing the mac.
back to the actual topic of this post...
i love how it says 'ages 4 and up'
as if playing with a smouldering corpse or a dead ewok is appropriate for, say, anyone?
ROFL...I love it...where is Uncle Lars, I think he and Aunt Beru should come in a combo pack
@Jeff_McAwesome, enine: This is why there's AdBlock.
Whither the Porkins?
@Seiven: [www.mcmorran.org] ([www.mcmorran.org])
@Gizmo: I don't mind ads per se. I mind ads that intervene on what I'm trying to look at. When they are overly large and actually obstruct things, I remove them. When they are in the middle of an article, I remove them. If they are all flashy and obnoxious, I remove them. Ads are just becoming more and more intrusive and beginning to be a burden.
Ahh Firefox. Thank you for hiding the giant Apple ad I have heard so many rumors of....
Dead Ewok. Now THAT'S comedy!
I got the force one. I sent in 12 UPC symbols and 4.95 S&H for it. The gun was suppose to shoot, but after kid safety tests they glued it to the forces' hand.
What can you do?
@HeartBurnKid:
You didn't read what I said. I have no issue with ads per se and realize they support the web sites I'm browsing, its just they need to be done properly.
I no longer use any Yahoo services after that first x10 camera popup years ago an the animated ads and spyware they pushed out.
Sure, the ads pay the writers, the hosting etc, etc.
But the money they generate is based on how many of us poor sods had to deal with them (rather than register them, click if interested, or not).
For a tech blog to have ads regularly interfere with it's readability (which they do, about half the time)... it's just not cricket.
@enine: And that's the exact reason why I started using AdBlock; because you can't always rely on a site to do ads properly. And even if the site owner is vigilant, a rogue banner can easily insert a little exploit code, and bam! intrusive pop-up, flash overlay, etc.
Yeah, yeah, I know sites derive their funding from ads, but you know what they say about bad apples and bunches.
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