Moronic Newspapers Reprint Onion's Neil Armstrong Conspiracy Article as Fact

I thought some "readers" were joking when they claimed they believed the Onion's story on a conspiracy theorist finally convincing Neil Armstrong about how the Moon landings were faked. They weren't. Like these two newspapers, who reprinted it as fact. More »

Facebook "Revolutionizes How Parents Stalk College-Aged Kids"

The Onion has drafted another startlingly important report examining how parents can use Facebook and Twitter to stay involved with their otherwise reluctant children. More »

Google Offers Users Total Privacy (In an Airless, Deadly Mountain Prison)

Today's Onion News Network video attacks Google's scary-if-you-think-about-it access to all our browsing habits and personal data. If you want privacy, no problem: Just relocate to a giant boxlike mountain prison, and you'll be secure (and dead). Zing! More »

Sanyo's Fate Rests In the Hands of One Man and a Rebate Form

The Onion delivers again, this time reporting on how badly Sanyo doesn't want a guy to mail in the rebate that came with his cordless phone. More »

So Mean But Maybe True (NSFW)

The Onion pisses on pretty much the entire gadget-making game with this fake news piece. Lots of cursing, do not watch unless you have a mouth like a Gizmodian. More »

Kim Jong Il's Plan to Bring the Moon to North Korea Isn't Actually Real...Right Guys?

Breaking news from The Onion: Kim Jong Il will transport the moon to North Korea by 2015. And it's a plan that's so damn crazy that it just might work. [via bbGadgets]

Ultimate Portable Sewing Machine to Make Clothing Companies Margins Increase

At last, good news for worldwide economy. A Bangladeshi company has released the SmartStitch, a portable sewing machine that will allow clothing factory workers to produce 24/7, with obvious benefits.

The Onion Unleashes New Fake Gift Boxes for 2008, As Awesome as Ever

Every year, The Onion sells boxes for fake, horrible-looking products to prank unsuspecting gift-receivers with. They've got two new one's this year: the iFeast and Kleen-Stride.

"Blockbuster" Living History Museum Offers Insight Into the Past

I don't want to spoil anything here more than the headline already has, but the visually hilarious Onion News Network has a biting critique of the movie rental chain Blockbuster. We actually like Blockbuster because of our grandfathered unlimited in-store exchanges and two free game rentals a month, but this is still pretty funny. [The Onion]

Diebold Accidentally Leaks 2008 Election Results Early

Diebold, the company run by unscrupulous Republicans that manufactures crappy, easily-hacked voting machines, has done a bang-up job of pretty much destroying many people's confidence in the legitimacy of the democratic process. No one is better at calling out such depressing aspects of our country with biting humor like The Onion, who here tell us about how all the fun of the election this year was ruined because Diebold accidentally leaked the results ahead of time. It's funny because it could be true! Ha… ha? [The Onion]

The Onion 'Reports' on Virgin Galactic, Gets it All Wrong

The Onion has finally gotten around to reporting on Virgin Galactic unveiling its new spaceship, and I'm pretty sure they got most of the facts wrong. Personally, I think The Onion could use a little bit more serious reporting. Will passengers really get "awesome robot sex" in space? I somehow doubt it, but if so why don't you quote your sources, Onion? Hello, fact checking! Let's try to take things more seriously Onion, shall we? Your reputation is at stake. [The Onion]

The Onion's New GotchaBoxes for 2007: Even More Hilarious Than Last Year

The witty pranksters at The Onion are at it again, creating a whole new set of four GotchaBox containers for Christmas, 2007. Get one of these fake boxes ($7.99, or $17.99 for a three-pack, available November 19) and wrap it up with a real (or shitty) gift inside. Then watch their faces as they try to get all excited about a non-existent gadget such as an auto power strip, a smoke alarm that plays sounds of the rain forest, or this "Visor.ganizer" that can supposedly carry up to seven pounds of crap in the visor of your hat. These are even better than last year's batch, which included our favorite, the USB Toaster. Hilarious. Check out the gallery below for the mirth and madness in all its glory. [The Onion Store] More »

Onion Does iPhone Parody

The Onion—who's really hit or miss nowadays—just did a parody on some of the iPhone features. We're going to have to put this into the SNL iPhone and MadTV iPhone pile as unfunny parodies, unlike the iPhone Commercial spoof, which made us chuckle a bit. – Jason Chen More »

The Onion: Even CEO Can't Figure Out How RadioShack Still In Business

The retail outlet boasts more than 6,000 locations in the United States, and is known best for its wall-sized displays of obscure-looking analog electronics components and its notoriously desperate, high-pressure sales staff. Nevertheless, it ranks as a Fortune 500 company, with gross revenues of over $4.5 billion and fiscal quarter earnings averaging tens of millions of dollars.

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Apple iLaunch: The Product-Unveiling Product

In a big media event yesterday, which we unfortunately missed, Apple unveiled the iLaunch, according to The Onion.

"Get ready for the future of product introduction," said Jobs, looking resplendent in a black turtleneck and faded jeans. "The iLaunch will be able to make announcements from this, or any other stage, making human participation in generating consumer awareness almost entirely unnecessary."

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The Onion Reports on iPhone 2.0

The Onion's satire piece on the development of iPhone 2.0, due out only months after the first rev, is only too close to the truth. More »

The Onion Poops on Sirius Radio

Yeah, mostly everyone I know hates satellite radio. If they don't hate satellite radio, they don't care about it. If they don't care about it, it's because they don't recognize its existence. Which is why The Onion is reporting on the new Sirius lineup, to help fight its negative and/or non-existent image. Here are some new shows and channels Sirius is rolling out to gain new listeners: More »

The Onion's GotchaBox Plays Mind Games With Greedy Fools

If you're sick and tired of all the Christmas greed, now you can start fucking with your gift recipients, giving them a faked-up GotchaBox with an old pair of socks inside. Who better to make up fraudulent packaging than those merry pranksters at The Onion? They're jerking around everybody with a $20 set of three realistic boxes printed with slick graphics promising absurdities such as a USB Toaster, a Salt-of-the-Month Club membership or a Make-Your-Own-Umbrella Kit. More »