Ok, maybe the part about this commercial being catchy isn't such a great thing. Excuse me while I crawl back under a rock where I'm safe from things like this seasonal torture. [Thanks, OMG! Ponies!]

Maybe I'm just so enamored with this commercial because my home smells of freshly baking cookies or maybe it's a general adoration for alternate versions of "The Twelve Days of Christmas," but I just think it's a lovely Christmas greeting from Apple. Even if the voiceover guy doesn't really sing. [TUAW]

Droid Does

Verizon's Droid commercials haven't been around very long, but I already keep seeing various combination of "iDon't" and "Droid does" being incorporated into everything from tweets to articles. (Hell, even we couldn't resist it once or twice.)

I can sort of forgive occurrences of the tagline slipping into reviews or posts about the actual gadget, but several days ago I found myself overhearing a fellow practically reciting the first Droid commercial to mock his buddy's iPhone preference. I seriously hope that I was in some sort of bizarro coffee shop or that maybe this guy was just an oddity. Please just skip this tagline, because I assure you: That guy sounded like a complete asshole.

There's an App for That

C'mon. Be honest. How often have you slipped this gem of a tagline into a comment? And how often have you groaned or rolled your eyes because you saw someone else remark that there is in fact an app for that? It was barely funny the first few times, but at this point even your grandma is using it and that oughta tell you something.

And no, changing a word doesn't make you sound like less of an asshole.

Think Different

Once upon a time, Apple's "Think Different" commercial made me smile at its cleverness. Then I saw the commercial a second time and I cringed. It's actually kinda cheesy and the tagline isn't much better. No matter what the concept behind it is, it basically feels like it's a nicely cut down version of the trite and overused "think outside of the box" and hearing it used feels just as irritating.

Can You Hear Me Now?

Unless you're genuinely wondering if the person you're talking to can hear you, there's no way to not sound like an asshole when using the "Can you hear me now?" tagline. Not even in an ironic look-at-me-I'm-so-cool-that-I-can-say-this-to-mock-it way.

Besides, while I'm certain that he's a nice fellow, do you really want to associate yourself with the slightly dorky-looking Verizon Guy?

It Keeps Going, and Going, and Going...

Last weekend I asked a friend how her date went. She remarked that he was like an Energizer bunny. And, as she thought I was confused by the expression, she continued to explain that he "kept going, and going, and going..." and it took me quite some willpower to not break down in tears on the spot. Someone so clever and lovely insisted on using a reference and a tagline so incredibly cliched that I'd initially thought I'd heard wrong. Please. Think of a better description for these things. (Especially since it's probably inaccurate in that scenario since hardly gentlemen really manage to keep up with that darned bunny rabbit.)

Where Do You Want to Go Today?

Oh, as much as Microsoft's good old "where do you want to go today?" annoys me, I actually crave to hear it sometimes. Such as in place of that grunt and nod I get from cab drivers. As with the "can you hear me now?" tagline, this one should only be used when you mean it literally and aren't attempting to make an allusion to the commercial.

Intel Inside

I've seen "baby inside," "beauty inside," "goddess inside," "whiskey inside," and who-knows-what-else inside tshirts, bumper stickers, and undies. Unless I'm seriously mistaken, those are spin-offs to the ancient "Intel inside" and they're not exactly funny anymore. I doubt that anyone can show me a single example of play on that tagline that won't make me roll my eyes (but feel free to try). In the meantime: Let's just not add to the ridiculousness.

I guess with that price, odds are that it's probably the kitchen tool. Geez. Talk about a tease after all those borderline-NSFW puns.

If you don't feel like watching the whole ad, jump to about 1:50. It's where the truth is revealed. It's also the moment when I began to daydream about the days when ads actually showed the product for more than a few seconds. [Thanks, GitEmSteveDave!]

I just really need to know whether the voice over guy or the girl with the measuring tape are included with the purchase or sold separately.

It's a simple text link that leads to Google's mobile partners page which then has a link to the actual Verizon Wireless site. But despite that extra click, it's still incredibly rare to see any sort of ad on the otherwise clean homepage. Especially when it kinda conflicts with Google's attempts to make the things even more minimalist lately. [TechCrunch]

This is especially disappointing not just because the Zune HD is a great device that deserves a great commercial but also because Microsoft is definitely capable of pumping out interesting, memorable advertising. This older Zune ad has great visuals, a killer soundtrack ("Lake Michigan" by Rogue Wave) and a high adorability factor. The new Zune HD ad glosses over the killer design of the device and very prominently (and mysteriously) features "Games," accompanied by a racing game that definitely isn't actually available.

The ad is so short that I'm sure it's just a teaser, to be upstaged by a legit ad soon, but seriously, Microsoft: The Zune HD has a ton of personality. Show it off. [YouTube via Engadget]

Most probably, the thing I like more is that the copy reads a lot like modern Apple ads. [Mac Mothership]

Can someone make me a happier version, so I can resume normal daily functions? Thanks. [YouTube via BBG]

The original Lauren 2.0 spot's been pulled off YouTube, and in the re-cut version, the reference to the MacBook Pro costing two grand has been dropped (since "MacBook Pro," whatever that means now, starts at $1200). Not that it actually changes the intent of ad one bit, since Lauren 2.0 still manages to get in there, "It seems like you're paying a lot for the brand."

Which is all it needs to say, really, since that's what most people already think because of Apple's own success at positioning itself as a premium brand, even as they cut prices on basically everything they make.

Success is a bitch that way sometimes. [YouTube via AdAge via MacRumors]

Oh. Oh yeah. But hey, they work, so you can't really fault Microsoft for doing something sorta similar in tone and feel, but you know, less smarmy.

Either way, can I get that wall-sized monitor they're demoing Windows 7 on? [Tour Windows 7 via Neowin]

I'm sure Mac fansites will point out the MacBook Pro she sneers at for being $2000 is two inches bigger than the 13-inch Dell Studio XPS she winds up with, and she should've looked at the regular MacBook, which starts at $999, close to what she pays for the Dell. But we all know that's not the point. It's a flame war, people—just one with a budget.

I liked the old Lauren better. [YouTube]

Here's a sample of the nearly two full pages of micro-font dickitude in the ad:

To remove unneeded bloatware first open uninstaller, select applications to remove, and uninstall. To remove optional components, click start, go to all programs and open control panel, select remove components, select components you want to remove, select next, when done, select finish. Once initial prep is complete, PCs may then be easy to use under certain controlled conditions and when properly maintained. In order for PCs to achieve optimal performance on a regular basis and for long periods of time, routine maintenance should include (but is not limited to) the following: download and install updated anti-virus software, run anti-virus software, check for system updates, clean out registry, defragment hard drive, free up disk space, remove temporary Internet files, empty the recycle bin, remove unnecessary programs, run error check utility and fix file system errors.

Ready the salvos, the Mac vs. PC war just got hot again and it's only going to get steamier. [MacJournals via Macworld]