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Bottle Opener

star trek

Crack Open a Synthehol With Classic Star Trek Bottle Opener

We can't imagine this bottle opener would have any use in the Star Trek universe (rudimentary hyper spanner, perhaps?), but here at home in 2008 anything that reeks of Trek and assists with inebriation is an indispensable tool. As you can see, the metal opener is all sorts of shiny, and is styled after the original Enterprise NCC-1701. The nacelles serve as leverage to help you crack open a Romulan Ale, Cardassian Ale, or just a plain ol' Budweiser. Expect this to hit store shelves at the end of June for about $23. [Red5]

open this

Moaner Lisa Bottle Opener Makes Clear Her Orgasmic Views on Beer Drinking

Oh Moaner Lisa, where were you two nights ago when we really needed you? Popping tops off the finest beers with her hind quarters, she gets off on the whole operation, moaning and gasping while releasing your favorite brewski and its foamy suds from its glassy confines. While yelping out her urgent cries to her relentless operator and all within earshot, she'll clamp down on any bottle cap, no matter how bourgeois its underlying contents, opening up its spirits to the outside world with her helpful vaginismus. Add this piece of valuable entertainment to your misogynistic utensil collection for a mere 4.99 (about $10). Yes, we'll have what she's having. [Cocktail Equipment, via Shiny Shiny]

user-created

Mophie Bevy is an iPod Shuffle Case, Bottle Opener

Either kids think of the darndest things, or there is a major alcoholism epidemic going on throughout our high schools. Back in January, at MacWorld, Mophie held an event and allowed the participants to doodle design ideas, and the best idea was actually manufactured. Seventeen-year-old Jared Fiovorich was the winner with his design of the Bevy, an iPod shuffle case and bottle opener. I like the product quite a bit, mainly because it can crack open cold ones, hold the shuffle and earbuds, but I guess Jared will have to stick with opening IBC Root Beers for four more years. $15. More »

peripherals

Popdrive Bottle Opening USB Flash Drive

Finally, a company has combined my two favorite hobbies. Thank you for fulfilling my dream of being able to transfer files with ease and crack open a cold one almost at the same time with one convenient device. This Popdrive is a 1GB flash drive that sits securely in the handle of a standard bottle opener. Chalk this peripheral up as another goodie from the fine folks at SkyMall. The question still remains: Is it a bottle opener with a flash drive or a flash drive with a bottle opener? *Head explodes* $30. More »

home entertainment

Glass With Bottle Opener

If you're always misplacing your bottle opener, perhaps you should save yourself the effort of searching over and over again and just buy a few of these nifty glasses with bottle openers in their bottoms. You can get your choice of blue, yellow or orange openers. More »