Gizmodo: butter

Butter Smeared On Giant Bridge To Prevent Suicides and Traffic Jams

Sean Fallon — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:20:00 EDT

Butter. It's tasty and it just happens to be an ideal lubricant for suicide hotspots like giant steel bridges.

Take this bridge in Guangzhou China for example:

Government officials in Guangzhou in south east China ordered workers to smear butter on all of the climbable surfaces of the 1,000 foot long steel bridge.

Government spokesman Shiu Liang said: "We tried employing guards at both ends but that didn't work - and we put up special fences and notices asking people not to commit suicide here. None of it worked - and so now we have put butter over the bridge and it has worked very well. Nobody can get up there and anybody who tries either falls"

Apparently, they were fed up with traffic jams caused by motorists slowing down to watch people jump (or threaten to jump) to their deaths. Mmm...suicide butter jam. [Metro]

Taste Test is our weeklong tribute to the leaps that occur when technology meets cuisine, spanning everything from the historic breakthroughs that made food tastier and safer to the Earl-Grey-friendly replicators we impatiently await in the future.

Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class

Mark Wilson — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 15:20:00 EST

When I cook, I generally just estimate my butter measurements. One tablespoon equals half a stick, two tablespoons becomes a whole stick. What can I say, I like to keep things simple.

The KitchenArt Buttermate adds overrated precision measurements to the butter+me-life=happy equation. Using an admittedly interesting slider system, you can select teaspoons, tablespoons or even pats, slicing the required allotment with an integrated stainless steel blade.

If you feel the need to better apportion your butter, the Buttermate is available for $6.50. [Amazon and The Home Marketplace via bookofjoe]

Precision Butter Cutter Cuts Butter Better

Jason Chen — Tue, 09 Oct 2007 16:40:05 EDT

Did you know that 8mm of butter is the only safe quantity? 9mm will give you a stroke, and 7mm will ensure permanent erectile dysfunction—and to this end, the Precise Butter Cutter will protect you and your loved ones by allowing you to always cut 8mm of butter every single time. Just slide the ruler along and chop. Simple, painless, $9. Precise Butter Cutter is not a proven cure for butterfaces. [Amazon via Smart Stuff via Random Good Stuff]

Cat+Toast=Anti-Gravity

blongo3 — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 21:15:32 EDT

For this anti-gravity experiment we will need one cat (preferably cute) and one piece of toast buttered on one side only. Now this experiment relies on two constants, one being a cat in motion will always land on its feet. And the other being when buttered toast travels from point X to point Y, it will always land butter side down.

Once the cat and toast have been properly joined together with the butter side facing away from the fur step back and enjoy, because there is no way for this paired object to reach the ground according to our newly proven scientific laws. Think about it, if the toast were about to land buttered side down that would void the kitten from landing on its feet. However, if the kitten was to land on its paws then the buttered side of the toast wouldn't be face down on the floor. There is no conceivable way for them both to land.

There you have it, the first ever kitten n' toast anti-gravity device. Now we must work on securing them to snowboards only then will we be on to something truely great.

Cats Anti-Gravity Device [Funnymos]

One Click Butter Cutter for Calorie Counters, Obsessives, Lazy Bums

Charlie White — Tue, 10 Oct 2006 15:00:00 EDT

Too tired or lazy to cut your butter in the morning? Here's a machine that'll do it for you, precisely measuring a 35-calorie portion at a time. Keep in mind, butter is 100% fat.

This could actually be useful. If you're a fanatic about calorie counting, dole out a controlled portion, count it accurately, slim down. While you're at it, don't forget to count those crows on the clothesline. – Charlie White

Product Page [whatever works, via ber review]

Treehugger's "Waste of Packaging" Contest Finalist

johnb — Fri, 24 Feb 2006 16:31:06 EST

Treehugger's "Waste of Packaging" contest finalist Kathleen Robinson has given peanut butter lovers a whole new world of variety. Kathleen's entry consisted of individually packaged peanut butter slices for the whole family to enjoy. Kathleen, however, does provide an optimistic view on the whole idea saying that the inventor should have just sold the "unsticky" peanut butter in blocks, instead of individually packaged slices. Consumers could then use a cheese grater on a block of peanut butter and use shredded peanut butter on anything their peanut butter loving hearts desire. Close your eyes and picture a place where there's an unsticky block of peanut butter. That would truly be tomorrow land.

Individually Packaged Peanut Butter [treehugger]