Jimmy Fallon recently took on the Hyperloop during his regular “Pros and Cons” segment, and described Elon Musk’s precious, tubular baby as “Thomas the Train on cocaine.” He also compared passengers to human spitballs. The future is going to be great, everyone!
So say you need to get a few hundred pounds of cocaine from Mexico to the US. Underground, preferably, so as not to attract too much attention. Where’s the best place one might, hypothetically, do this? Asking for a friend.
Remember that scene in Traffic where they mold cocaine into dolls? This kind of trickery happens in real life, too. A band of international smugglers recently got caught with over $370 million worth of cocaine disguised as 40 shipping pallets. No, the pallets weren’t filled with cocaine. The pallets were cocaine.
This is no longer a purely theoretical question, thanks to the modern world. Giving a liberal dose of cocaine to an eel turns out to be far worse for the eel than it is for us.
Ready for some weird science? Certain bacteria found in the dirt near coca plants are powered by an enzyme that eats cocaine. Unfortunately, the enzyme breaks down quickly at body temperature, meaning it can't be used to treat human overdoses or addiction. Now, though, researchers have designed a version that can…
Welp, that settles that. Anybody who was wondering if authorities were going to keep going after the arrest of Silk Road kingpin Ross Ulbricht and start targeting users don't need to wonder anymore. Multiple arrests have now been made worldwide, and it looks like more are on the way.
Don't do drugs, people. But if you do do them, don't overdose on 'em. But if you do overdose on 'em, make sure the drugs you're doing are weed, LSD, opium and mushrooms and not pharmaceutical pills. That's because pharmaceuticals kill more people in America than any other type of drug. What?
Have you ever had one of those days where you thought to yourself "Boy, I sure wish I didn't have this sexy yet expensive cocaine addiction"? Fortunately for you, there could be a new solution on the horizon, and all you have to do is fry your brain with lasers. Equally sexy.
By now you've likely heard the horrifying tale of the naked Florida man who was shot by police while eating another man's face. What possessed Rudy Eugene to consume 75-percent of a homeless man's face? Drugs, obviously. It's not totally clear which drugs Eugene was on, but police have speculated that the attack was…
In a pleasant surprise (or scary discovery, depending on your perspective), Cindy Davidson found something weird about the tampons she recently bought: they were laced with cocaine. Specifically, a bunch of cocaine was put in the tampon's applicator so it could be smuggled around.
Cocaine turns anybody that takes it into a bit of a douche—we all know what. But while there's plenty of evidence that the drug affects heart function and screws up the brain's natural reward system, here's another reason to avoid it: scientists have found that it, quite literally, rots your brain.
Thirty pounds of cocaine was mysteriously delivered to the United Nations mailroom according to a report. There are no further details available about the incident, but it makes wonder how all of that blow got that far undetected.
Rome's airport police have caught a busty model trying to smuggle 2.5 kilograms (5.5 pounds) of cocaine inside her fake breast and buttocks' implants.
Scientists can now accurately detect drugs floating in the air. They also have found statistical relationships between atmospheric cocaine levels and certain types of cancers, as well as a connection between marijuana levels and mental disorders.
I'm not gonna name names, but someone just mentioned paying for weed with a Square account. It'd be equally easy to use Paypal, Venmo, Bitcoin (RIP) or any of the myriad mobile payment systems that allow you to send money from your phone.
Five of the 20 best-selling casual game apps in Android's Marketplace involve illegal drugs. Virtual illegal drugs, of course! Guess how many are available for the iPhone? Yep, zero.
A 20-year-old Irish man was caught by the Brazilian Federal Police with 72 bags of cocaine inside his intestines. This is how he looked inside, using a three-dimensional computed tomography body scanner. It's actually more disgusting than I expected.
We need to consider, as a society, that we've run out of decent ways to smuggle cocaine. I say this because David Pocasangre Vaquiz was arrested outside DC with $10,000 worth of coke stuffed into 80 clams. Clams.
Marijuana, hue notwithstanding, is not exactly new school green. In fact, it's the worst drug for the environment. Marijuana growers use $5 billion worth of electricity to power lightbulbs, fans, dehumidifiers and whatever else it takes to grow weed. That's 1% of the national electricity consumption.