Gizmodo: cows

Cows That Get Massaged With a Big Robo-Brush Are Happier, Make Better Milk

Adam Frucci — Wed, 25 Mar 2009 17:20:00 EDT

If you watch just one video online today, let it be this strangely hypnotizing video of cows getting super excited about a gigantic, robotic cow brush.

Apparently, cows absolutely love getting their rub on with these giant brushes, and when they're happy, they make better milk. So, farm owners, hop on board with the DeLaval cow brush for all your cow brush needs. Also, where'd you find the sweet jams? [Trendhunter]

Somebody, Please Shoot This Poor USB Cow

Mark Wilson — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 14:20:00 EST

Is this a USB cow, or yet another victim in the underground ring of S&M gadget slavery? If only we could speak cow to interpret the vocalized "moo" whenever a USB stick is inserted. [Gadget4All]

Fart Tanks Fight Methane, Give Al Gore Weird Ideas

Jesus Diaz — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 11:15:00 EDT

Being the world's largest beef producer with 55 million cows, Argentinian scientists tested claims about bovines being one of the worst polluters on the planet thanks to the methane they produce. To do this, they used big pink tanks on top of the cows, connected to their intestines with a tube inserted into their rear end (what scientist technically refer to as "That Cow's Ass").

The amount of gas they collected went from 8,000- to 1,000-litre emissions in a day, and the conclusions are clearly indicative on how dangerous farts can be, especially if your partner raises the bedsheets at the wrong time in the middle of the night (cue laughing track here). Knowing that methane traps 23 times more heat in the atmosphere than carbon dioxide, I won't be surprised if some activists start demanding fart tanks for everyone on the planet. [Daily Telegraph]

Scientists Discover How to Neutralize Cow Farts; Your Farts Next, God Willing

Adam Frucci — Mon, 28 Jan 2008 13:37:05 EST

Sure, Hummers are bad for the environment, but do you know what else is? Cow farts. Yep, the methane in cow farts contributes to a surprisingly-high 5% of all global warming gasses out there, with methane being 22 times more potent at capturing atmospheric heat than carbon dioxide. The good news? A couple of Japanese scientists seem to have stumbled upon a way to neutralize this problem.

Costing about $1 per day per cow, some simple food additives that include a blend of nitrates and the amino acid cysteine could greatly suppress the methane production in a cow's stomach, making their emissions much more earth-friendly. No word on how earth-friendly it'll make your emissions, but I think it's safe to say your friends and family all have their fingers crossed for a successful crossover. [Times Online; image via Treehugger]

Moo Moo USB Toy For Lovesick Cows Everywhere

AddyDugdale — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 04:24:05 EST

Ah, Mondo USB. A strange place, full of really useless gizmos that no one really needs. And the Moo Moo is exactly that: basically a plastic cow that you and your better half attach to your computers, you press the button when you're feeling lonely and ~~an 18-stone transsexual appears from nowhere to do unspeakable things to you~~ the corresponding beast attached to your sweetheart's machine will moo, too. When she presses hers, it's your cow that lows. Pointless yet poignant, the secret of all good USB toys. There's a video after the jump.

Suddenly, everything in the world seems better, doesn't it? [Everything USB]

40 Tons of Cow Intestine, Spilled by MP3 Distraction

Mark Wilson — Sun, 11 Feb 2007 10:11:38 EST

Gizmodo tip: If you are driving 40 tons worth of cow intestine around in your truck, just turn on the radio. There's no need to fiddle with your MP3 player, find yourself distracted and spill your 40 tons of cow intestine in the road. Trust us, it happens.

Bonus tip: This rule also applies for transporting cadavers, manure and boxed sets of Friends. – Mark Wilson

Truck Spills 40 Tons of Cow Intestine [yahoonews]

Bluetooth Cattle, Moo

Travis Hudson — Wed, 19 Oct 2005 10:18:01 EDT

This is the world's first long range Bluetooth headset integrated into cattle. So basically farmer Joe doesn t have to carry his fancy phone out on the pasture while doing his farmer Joe work. When a call comes in he simply has to go to the nearest cow ass and proceed to yell into the anal area for a clear conversation usually regarding grain silos and such.

Ha! Just joshin' you! Bluetooth is integrated into the cows; it monitors the health and location of each individual cow and relays the information back to a main computer. This is being developed by the Danish Cattle Research Centre and the Danish Institute of Agricultural Sciences.

Blue Milk? Cattle go wireless [Phoneyworld]