Gizmodo: crapmodo

The 99-Cent iPod Radio Cheapo Knock-Off of the Year

AddyDugdale — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 07:30:00 EDT

Last week, Stephen Gerding of the Kung-Fu Rodeo blog found this 99-cent iPod lookalike radio in his corner store. There are two buttons on the "click" "wheel." One for scan, another for reset, and you've got to marvel at the technology they must have used for the full-color screen. Unboxed pic below.

Oh. It's a stuck-on picture. Jobso must be quaking in his boots. The radio comes with earphones and a handy carrying strap, just so you don't drop it on the sidewalk and see its guts (which are probably made of cardboard) spill out. Still, Stephen's psyched, because the thing works quite well.
[Kung-Fu Rodeo—thanks, Flavio]

Backyards Scream "Classy!" With StereoStone Birdbath Fountain Speaker

Wilson Rothman — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 17:00:47 EDT

Sorry, but I just can't believe anyone's going to buy this. Not only does it just look ridiculous, with its faux stone carving topped with a leafy pineapple, and its two submerged halogen lights. (Why not four lights, or a whole ring of them? I mean, if you're going cheesy, go all the way.) On the good side, it does contain a hidden 8-inch 250-watt stereo speaker system, and can plug directly into a standard 120V wall unit. But still, it's not worth it at any price, especially not $600. Yes, I said $600. [Electronic House via Ubergizmo]

Nokia's Touch UI Hands-On: Officially Way Behind Apple

Brian Lam — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 15:01:50 EST

When we first saw the Nokia Symbian Touch UI over the familiar S60/Symbian OS, we were stoked. Then we found out it was not a working proto but a rendering, and we wondered how far along they really were in their touchscreen UI. Turns out, not as far as we would like.

The working prototype here is very rough. It's missing animations between picture swipes and lacks truly natural menu swiping. It also doesn't support multitouch here, but that's a matter of hardware—and this is early software, so we should be not too harsh on Symbian for updating their great OS to keep up with the Joneses. But we can conclude one thing from this demo: Despite doing a good job of building a touch UI on S60 without alienating current users, Symbian is far behind Apple in UI development, by months, if not years.

iPod May Shuffle You From Rolling Stone to Roadkill, Australian Ad Says

Jesus Diaz — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 09:15:16 EST

A new ad in Australia highlights the dangers of crossing the road with your MP3 player rumbling your inner ear canal at full volume. And of course, it shows the iPod in a new twist of Apple's original silhouettes campaign, now using the headphones cable as a way to draw the place in which a body lies dead. Ah, nothing like a great morbid image to start up a pre-MacWorld wednesday.

The ad was created by advertising agency DDB in Sydney, all after the State Traffic Commander, Chief Superintendent John Hartley said:

"The NSW police would look at the New York senator's proposal and the impact it may have in twelve months' time," as reported in an article entitled "Alert Sounded on iPod Use" by Asher Moses on February 7, 2007 in The Sydney Morning Herald. Superintendent Hartley went on in that same article to say; "You can't legislate stupidity - if people are stupid enough to do something that's so distracting they can't see cars coming, that's a problem they need to deal with."

Sounds reasonable enough, but apparently the problem started to get really serious (yes, a lot of stupid people in the world, it seems) and the authorities decided to warn all those crazy crazy personal media player junkies. To probably be ignored shortly thereafter. [iPhone Savior]

Hands-On Proposal: Euricase Multimedia Ring Box

Mark Wilson — Tue, 08 Jan 2008 19:32:36 EST

The Gadget: Euricase Multimedia Ring Box, adds a 2-inch LCD and 60 minutes of video to otherwise meaningless jewelry boxes.

The Catch: Sarah Meyers!

The Verdict...

I sleep on the couch for the three months following CES. Don't worry honey, you know I'd never propose to an internet celebrity with such a tacky, tacky product.

Taser Gun + MP3 Player + Leopard Skin = One Insane Gadget

Adam Frucci — Mon, 07 Jan 2008 14:14:23 EST

Taser wants its products to be common gadgets along the same lines as cell phones and MP3 players; you know, the stuff you always carry with you. That's why it's released a belt holster for its tasers that can be loaded up with 1GB of MP3s.

Perhaps the most feature-free MP3 player we've ever seen, it has a mere 2 buttons and no screen on it. But hey, it holds a Taser! I'd like to see an iPod actually prevent you from being mugged instead of the other way around. Oh, and it also unveiled leopard print and pink Tasers, just in case you want to look fashionable before taking someone who's political beliefs you disagree with down to the pavement.

DXG-566V: A $150 High Def Camcorder?!

Brian Lam — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 21:18:43 EST

The What: DXG has always gone for the low cost bragging rights and they've reached the height of their budget crusade with this $150 HD camera that records to 1280 x 720 at its highest res. We've seen tapeless camcorders do this before, but that price is pretty insane. It records in H.264 quicktime files, and the camera takes 5mp native stills.
The Oh No You Didn't: I would expect that this captures the grainiest, most lifeless, tepid high def you've ever seen.

DXG-566V HD Features:
Camcorder Features:
Records full-motion video in high-definition
D1 Resolution: 720 x 480, at 30fps
HD Resolution: 1280 x 720, at 30fps
Records video in H.264, MOV file format
2X Digital Zoom
3.0" TFT Screen

Digital Camera Features:
5 Megapixel CMOS sensor
Captures still images in JPEG format
Up to 8 Megapixel image resolution

Mass Storage Features:
32MB onboard memory
SD Card slot to accept high-capacity or standard SD cards
Connect to your PC to store and transfer data files
USB2.0 Interface for fast transfer of files

Wonder Sauna Hot Pants Are the Most Shameful Products Ever

Adam Frucci — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 09:58:05 EST

These Wonder Sauna (Long) Hot Pants are the kind of product you find in the back of your grandparents closet that make you rethink everything you thought you knew about them. Namely, that they aren't retarded enough to buy a product called Wonder Sauna (Long) Hot Pants in the first place. Sucks for you, dude. The apple doesn't fall far from the idiotic grandparents. [Boing Boing Gadgets]

Mr. White Collar Gives You Three Insults in One

Charlie White — Mon, 03 Dec 2007 11:44:01 EST

Any way we look at it, this Mr. White Collar Calvaire Pen Holder and Message Stand leaves us nonplussed. WTF? Is this supposed to insult black people, christians, white collar workers, racists ... everyone? While it does offer a place to hold one pen and helpfully includes a pad on which you can write messages, we're not sure what the message of its creators would be. Mind you, we're not endorsing this goofy desk accessory, just scratching our heads. Take your chances for $9.99. [Giz Fever]

Eye Power, Your Pushbutton Nearsightedness Cure, or One-Way Ticket to Blindness

Charlie White — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 11:55:00 EST

If the thought of blindness doesn't scare you, this Eye Power thingamajig supposedly uses ultrasonic waves to somehow jostle your nearsighted eyeball into compliance. Its makers claim a ten-minute session can cure those bleary deadlights of yours, so you can toss away those specs and contacts, forever eagle-eyed and triumphant over your once-stubborn progressive myopia. Either that or start getting used to playing lots of blues and wearing very dark sunglasses.

Please, if you're going to drop $800 on this snake-oil experiment, just try it on one eye first. So it either works (doubtful), makes you blind, or does nothing but separate you from your $800. We're not about to test it. [Rakuten, via DVICE]

World's Crappiest Projector Reviewed

Charlie White — Wed, 28 Nov 2007 15:15:00 EST

Come along with us to a sideshow, starring the Torpedo Entertainment Projector by Senario, a $169 LCD unit made in China. We'll show you just how plum-awful a projector can be. We picked one up at a local Target store, put it on our test bench, and were shown a thing or two about projectors, video, plastic, and the difference between a toy and a real product. (And yes, it was in the toy department at Target.)

At $169, how bad could it be? Answer: horrible, and not even worth that. Perhaps you've heard of the "screen door effect" that's common with low-end LCD projectors. A screen door would be a blessing compared to this. Watching this felt more like being behind the bars of a jail cell than having a screen door in front of us.

After that initial shock, it was time to run some of our projector test patterns, playing them back at the native resolution of this little monster, which is supposed to project video at 920x240 pixels, but we're still not really sure whether that was what we are looking at or not. It's probably closer to a cellphone-like 320x240.

We popped up a white test pattern, and with our precision light meter, measured the lowest light levels of any projector that has ever graced (or sullied) our Midwest Test Facility. At the center of the screen, it was putting out a pathetic 120 lumens, and even that was profoundly uneven, with 70 lumens on the right side of the screen, 80 on the left, and 90 up top. There are dim light bulbs that are much brighter than this. Unless the room was completely dark, we could hardly see an image at all. We didn't realize the term "candlepower" was going to be taken literally here.

What about contrast ratio? Well, there wasn't any. We projected a white chip chart with numerous degrees of white down to light gray (see a shot of the projected chart in the gallery below), and you can hardly tell the difference between any of the chips. It was the worst contrast ratio, or lack thereof, we've ever seen.

We tried watching a DVD, and from the very beginning, it was some of the worst video we've ever encountered. For example, the FBI warning at the beginning of the DVD was not legible at all. It looked like hieroglyphics.

Games fared no better, looking as pixelated as any video could ever possibly be. And don't think we're just being projector snobs here, even though that's exactly what we are. Going into this review, we realized the low price of this projector, but didn't expect the quality to hit such a low point. The projector even smelled bad, like mildew, and made way more noise than we could bear if we wanted to concentrate on watching a movie or playing a game.

The upside? It looks kinda cool. But for $169, not cool enough. If this is a toy aimed at kids, it's not going to work. Even the most bleary-eyed numbskull kids would smell a rat, wondering why a Santa was punishing them. If you have a bad little boy in the house, this might just be the perfect gift. [Senario]

Diamond-Encrusted iPod shuffle Takes 'Fool and His Money' Prize

Charlie White — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 15:40:00 EDT

We're trying to understand why someone would buy this diamond-spangled solid gold iPod shuffle, which wins the prize for gaudiest second-rate music player. This one even outdoes that 18-karat solid gold iPod shuffle we pointed out to you last month, with this one tipping the more-money-than-brains pricetag scale of $20,000 compared with that solid gold shuffle's $19,343 price.

Adding even more expense and tawdriness to the equation are diamond-encrusted headphones. Although it's hard to decipher the Scandinavian language in which this is described, it looks like there are 430 diamonds festooning this otherwise utilitarian and screenless digital audio player. The irony doesn't escape us; at least they could've waited for the new iPod nano, and gussied that up with diamonds. Oh, wait, someone's probably going to do that, too. [e24, via LuxuryLaunches]