Gizmodo: dispenser

Portable Tap Dispenser: The Partier's Camelback

Dan Nosowitz — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 19:00:00 EDT

This is the Portable Tap Dispenser, a backpack with a dispensing tap for your brew of choice.

The Portable Tap Dispenser also has a cupholder so you can more fully cement your reputation as the Beer God of the Party. We're not sure exactly what the bag's capacity is, but it looks plenty big enough to get you a cheer when you walk into a get-together, provided you can serve the beer before it gets flat. It's available now for about $35. [Fun Ideas via Crunchgear]

Condom Dispenser Sets the Bar Too High

Jesus Diaz — Sat, 06 Sep 2008 12:00:00 EDT

At last. Female sex pros and male overachievers rejoice—as the rest of us scratch our heads and look somewhere else while the level indicator on this $28 condom dispenser keeps going down at the same rate of our hand cream dispenser. [Uncommon Goods via Random Good Stuff]

Hello Kitty Toilet Paper Dispenser Advances Buttocks Tech

Jason Chen — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 12:29:58 EST

Other than the iPod dock toilet paper speaker we thoroughly tested, there hasn't been any real advancement in the area of ass wiping technology in the past few years. This Hello Kitty dispenser changes everything with its automated dispensing unit that lets you program exactly how many sheets you want for your next wipe—which may sound useful, but doesn't quite account for when you've got hard, rocky poops followed by soft, liquidy ones. But when you slap a Hello Kitty logo and an automated turning mechanism onto something, you're pretty much pounding on the Nobel Prize committee's collective door and asking for the cash. [Kitty Hell]

Infrared Soap Dispenser Makes Your Home Like a Public Toilet

Jason Chen — Thu, 19 Apr 2007 16:40:26 EDT

Really savor the feeling of using sinks in public bathrooms? Now you can get halfway there with this infrared soap dispenser. All you need to do is add 4 AA batteries, pour in some liquid soap, spray some pee around and below the rim of the toilet, smear poop in the wall next to where you wrote your phone number in Sharpie, and voila, you're good to go.

How'd that one about George Michael's latest release go again? – Jason Chen

Product Page [Grandinroad via Red Ferret]

Box Wine Dispenser For Your Boxed Wine Presumably Comes in a Box

Jason Chen — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 21:20:10 EST

As if your Costco wine-in-a-box couldn't get any classier, this Wine Dispenser is shaped like a box and pours out wine like a cheap middle-school cafeteria worker. Available in black, white, and red, the box is made out of real metal and seriously impresses the ladies. And by ladies, we mean homeless ladies. – Jason Chen

Product Page [Poaa via Cooking Gadgets]

X-Paste, For Teeth (Not Penis)

Mark Wilson — Sat, 17 Feb 2007 13:00:33 EST

While its name tantalizes the libido with possibilities of a super sex cream/adhesive, the X-Paste is just for teeth (though what you do in the privacy of your bathroom is not for us to judge).

Mounting on your wall, the X-Paste is a pump that distributes the "perfect" amount of toothpaste on your brush. We've looked through the entire site, but we're still not certain how one pumps the device or defines "perfect" amount. So we'll have to assume that advanced AI uses a dual brainwave/stank breath detector to provide handless pumping that spews hundreds of gallons of toothpaste at ~~unwilling~~ willing bathroom-goers. $59 – Mark Wilson

Product Page [via uberreview]

Automatic Toothpaste Dispenser: One-Handed Toothbrushing

Charlie White — Mon, 23 Oct 2006 12:19:12 EDT

If you want to do up your bathroom all fancy-stylin' and move those half-squeezed toothpaste tubes out of sight, here's a stainless steel dispenser with suction cups you can mount to your mirror or any other smooth surface.

Accommodating any sized tube of toothpaste inside, it gives you one-handed dispensing, pumping out the toothpaste when you push on the bottom with your toothbrush.

It's hard to tell exactly how this $59.95 thingamajig works—the company says there's a "patented X-Pump" that mechanically forces out the toothpaste— but we'll believe it when we see it. – Charlie White

Product Page [Sharper Image, via Coolest Gadgets]

Elecom K-Scott CD Pouch Dispenser

Travis Hudson — Thu, 15 Jun 2006 11:46:09 EDT

Even though this product falls nicely into the "kind of useless" category, it would still fit nicely at any workstation, next to the other box of tissues—ahem—that keeps getting used even though you haven't been sick for months. The Elecom CD pounch dispenser will hold enough CD pouches to keep even the pirateiest pirate happy and burning all day without worrying about damage to the discs. Pretty good idea Elecom, but could you at least put it in a prettier box? – Travis Hudson

The Elecom CD pouch dispenser [Akihabara]

Disc Media Dispenser

Travis Hudson — Fri, 24 Mar 2006 15:16:12 EST

It's a new year and that means new style for everything. Getting media off of a spindle just isn t cool anymore. That is where the CD/DVD Dispenser comes into play. It can eject a single blank disc with the push of a button. The, originally named, DiscPod will be released later next month for less than $20. Now if only the DiscPod could be modded to directly load into optical drives.

CD/DVD blank media dispenser [TechJapan]