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04/01/09
04/01/09
Well, there is! Just enter the tag "gadget news for people with sticks up their asses", you'll get results appropriate for a Facebook commenter.
04/01/09
Your respect has been noted, Gizmodo. I get it. This is not a newsite for working professionals in the tech industry. Message recieved. Sorry for assuming that you were something that you are not. I feel kind of silly.
04/01/09
So, yes, you should feel this silly for being such a damn stick in the mud. Tomorrow things will all be back to normal, and you can look at your important blog stories.
04/01/09
Sorry. I appreciate a good joke, but the fact that they've spent all day at it just doesn't seem classy, and by clogging my rss feed they've kinda made their mess my problem.
I guess I AM a stick in the mud. This is basically the internet equivellant of a neighbor being mad that the huge rocking party next door is making so much noise that they can't get any work done, and that the jello-wrestling has spilled onto his front yard. I'm not saying "You should be ashamed, giz!" I'm saying "Hey guys? This one didn't work for me at all."
Other sites aren't doing this on the scale that you are. This is sloppy.
04/01/09
04/01/09
Jello-wrestling is sloppy.
Let's hear it for jello-wrestling! Who's with me?!
04/01/09
And, during certain hours they're allowed to have that huge rocking party next door. Are you saying people shouldn't be allowed to enjoy their property during the day because the person next door doesn't appreciate it?
04/01/09
I'm trying to say that I thought this was lame, not cool. I see that others on this thread agree with me. You are not one of those others. Good for you! Here's a cookie. I feel no need to defend my annoyance to you any further.
04/01/09
Hey! Over here. Yeah, me, bsskv. I am the asshat that referenced your silly jello-wrestling analogy, not Conficker Lite: Etc. C'mon, Capn, assign infamy where it's due! I work hard for my asshat status, ya' know?
04/01/09
Seriously though, if you don't like it, shut it off. Why type up a half page tirade about how angry/sad panda/disappointed you are when you could simply walk away for a whole day, and move on.
As for being argumentative, it's not really my fault you're not very good at making analogies. When people use them, I poke holes in them. Tends to take a lot of air out of false arguments when you do that. It isn't because I WANT to argue, I just don't like people being overly dramatic and whiny.
04/01/09
This wasn't funny, and it went on all day. I was annoyed earlier in the day, saved it, and posted about it when I was off work. That's the postings that you're seeing here.
Having explained the context and admitted that I am, perhaps, not a master of written communication, do I have your permission to hold the opinion that this was, in the grand scheme of things, one of the stupidest Net April Fools jokes that I saw this year? I don't want you to agree with that statement, I just want you to give me permission to have that opinion. Clearly I should have consulted with you before posting initially, what with your gold star and all.
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Hey! Don't be groaning at me. This is just the free material...you want the good stuff, you gotta pay.
04/01/09
originally heard this from my science teacher and googled it just now:
A man went to his dentist because he feels something wrong in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, "that new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?"
The man replies, "all I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious . . .. Hollandaise sauce. I loved it so much I now put it on everything - meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything." "Well," says the dentist, "that's probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It's eaten away your upper plate. I'll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome."
"Why chrome?" asks the patient.
The dentist replies, "It's simple. Everyone knows that there's no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise!"
see? this joke is priceless...well, not so much priceless as worthless...so no payment needed (although tips accepted).
04/02/09
In a tiny village in a far away time lived a race of beings called Trigs. They were little, little people. They lived in a valley secluded from the rest of civilization. To get supplies and other things, they would periodically have to climb out of their valley up a large mountain. Unfortunately, in a cave on the side of the mountain lived a mean, ugly troll. Many times the Trigs would try to climb the troll's mountain to get out of their valley, but the trol would come running out and kick all the Trigs back down the mountain send them into a humiliating and painful roll off his mountain and back into their valley.
Finally, the Trigs had had enough. The leader of the Trigs went to their local Rabbi and asked the Rabbi if he could intervene on their behalf and go talk to the troll. The Rabbi was a little skeptical that he could reason with the troll, but off he set to speak and negotiate with the menace.
Once he got to the troll's door, he knocked a few times. From inside came a voice: "Kind rabbi, please enter and have some tea." The Rabbi came inside, and the troll was the most gracious host he'd ever met in his life. They laughed, talked, and drank. The Rabbi actually enjoyd himself.
Eventually the rabbi got up enough courage to ask: "Mr. Troll, I came here today to talk to you about your Trig-kicking ways. I was afraid you'd kick me, too, but you've been so kind... I can't believe it. Why, oh why, do you menace the Trigs so, but are so kind to me?"
Came the reply from the troll: "Silly Rabbi. Kicks are for Trigs."
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ps: stfu whoever comments next
04/01/09
*cries*