People have been dreaming about loving giant women (or becoming giant women, for that matter) forever. But the Internet has fostered a really vibrant, creative community of people who've created artwork and lore. This fetish has a fancy name: macrophilia, according to this 1999 Salon article. There are actually two different types of macrophilia porn: There are women who've been hit with growth rays (or growth viruses) turning them into giants. And then there are men who've been hit with shrink rays or whatnot. The science-fiction origins of this fetish rest with movies like Attack OF The 50 Foot Woman and The Incredible Shrinking Man.

If you want to get the total awesomeness of giantess fetish, you have to go with artwork, which allows creators' imaginations to run wild. There are tons and tons of message boards and groups where people post their favorite art showing massive women and the doll-like men who love them. A lot.

And some of our favorite giantess art comes from Dream Tales, which kindly allowed us to feature a few images from their comics:

But adherents to this fetish also post tons and tons of homemade Photoshop collages, showing scantily dressed or naked women stomping across cities and trampling little men, including the one above, and these masterpieces:

There's even a giantess and shrunken men Flickr pool, where people post their own creations.

On the other hand, if you want actual professionally shot giantess porn, that exists as well. There are tons of pay porn sites that feature staged photos of women in their underwear, smashing model cities and stepping on toy soldiers. There's even HebrewGiantess.com, for those of you who just desperately needed "point of view" shots of a man looking up at a skyscraper-sized Jewish woman. Here are some of our favorite pay-site images:

But like many other niche fetishes, the love of giant women is (wait for it) big in Japan. Just check out this scene from a live-action video, featuring a man who's been shrunk to the size of a doll. The movie also includes scenes where the woman stimulates the helpless little man's tiny penis with a giant Q-tip. And the man climbs inside her vagina. But here's a nice scene where she licks his face and then he climbs onto her breast:

And then there's some amazing manga and hentai art from Japan, showing — among other things, a giant woman having sex with a giant robot.

Fans have also collected these amazing Kookai ads, featuring giant women and tiny men (via the defunct GTSFeet site):

So obviously, giantess porn, to some extent, is a fantasy about female power — women who grow to the size of a mountain are stand-ins for powerful women everywhere. But at the same time, you have to love the playfulness and sheer weirdness of the huge females crushing cities with the sheer force of their voluptuousness.

It was part of a campaign to raise awareness of STDs, asking people to get together inside the condom at different events through Italy, using Facebook, Twitter, and other internet sites. They were able to get 230 people inside at one of the events. I like absurd things like this. I just wish everyone were naked inside, wearing condoms themselves. [Direct Daily]

They had their ways. Although old-timers may tell you they had to wank uphill both ways in the snow, there was porn to be had. It might not have been great porn, but mankind got off before there even was porn.

The only odd part about many of these methods is that you had to interact with somebody to get your porn. An oddity in today's one-man private show in front of the computer.

Gizmodo '79 is a week-long celebration of gadgets and geekdom 30 years ago, as the analog age gave way to the digital, and most of our favorite toys were just being born.

Thanks to Noobs-R-Us in sparking the idea for this post

Sneaking into porn theaters. Yeah, there were porn theaters. These looked like regular theaters on the outside, but on the inside there were many, many more penises and vaginas. If you were underage but clever, you could somehow sneak into the theater via an older brother, a friend working at the theater or a fake mustache.

Of course, once you were inside and watching the movie, you still had to hold it until you got home. Despite it being a communal function, it was still generally frowned upon to pull one out while other dudes were sitting next to you.

Porn quality: 10
Privacy: 5

Using lingerie and clothing catalogs: Various women's undergarment catalogs like JC Penney provided ample material for the youngsters of the 70s. What they lacked in actual nudity they made up for in quality of models (sometimes).

Although guys (especially young ones) had easier access to these catalogs than more mature fare like Playboy or Penthouse, it was just as hard to explain away why they had one of these stashed under your bed. The excuse of shopping for a birthday/Christmas/Hanukkah present would be tenuous at best.

But, the fact that the models had most of their clothing on provided a great imagination-building exercise that strengthened minds for the future. This explains why movies today are just uninspired rehashes of what we already saw in the '80s.

Porn quality: 3.5
Privacy: 8

Image credit

Mental spank bank: The ultimate in bare-bones beating, this required you to be ultra-vigilant during your day in order to store images for later use. Trips to the beach, the department store changing room, the food court at the mall, the post office, the pool, the dentist's office, the Grand Canyon and the polling booth could all obtain lucrative deposits for your bank.

The downside, of course, is that this relied solely on your memory. So any errant noise or smell could interfere with the delicate recollection process, making an already longer-than-usual activity take even longer.

But, the fact that you can do this anywhere, in any position, trained you well for life down the road. If you can squeeze one out standing up in the shower, lying down in bed, squatting in the woods, kneeling in your neighbor's bushes or face down in your backyard, you could literally squeeze one out anywhere. At work, during your lunchbreak? No problem. At night, while you were visiting grandma's smelly apartment? Cake. In the car, waiting for your old lady to pick up the dry cleaning? Done and done.

Porn quality: 0-3 (Depending on how well your imagination worked)
Privacy: 10

Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler: As a teen, you may not have legally been able to get these magazines, but when has that problem stopped any kid from getting anything? You could bribe the guy at the corner store, swipe your dad's when he wasn't looking, borrow one from your friends, ask your older brother to buy one for you, or just plain steal one.

Although the more commonly available magazines didn't show hardcore penetration, it was usually enough for kids in the '70s to get the job done. If you somehow froze that same kid in 1979, unfroze him in 2009 and showed him YouPorn, he would simultaneously masturbate while holding up his other hand to shield his eyes in disgust. It's a new world, my friends.

Porn quality: 7
Privacy: 3

Nude scenes on TV: Before VHS (or Betamax) became common, people had to stick to their programming schedules. As Adam Carolla (a man who was alive and masturbating during the '70s) says, they had to time their diddling sessions in accordance to whatever movie was airing.

If something had a nude scene 57 minutes into the film and started at 11:00 PM, you would do the mental calculations and turn on the TV at 12:25 (accounting for commercials) and see maybe a boob and a half. That would have to last you for a week and a half.

Porn quality: 3
Privacy: 2

• Bigger start/stop button
• Variable speeds and intensity
• Pulsing action
• Video playback while vibrating
• Music playback while vibrating
• A laser show.

Grab yours now using App Tapp installer.app. Weee! Just remember that cleanliness is #1. [Thanks Pash]

After all, don't we all smell like tobacco after a good night of partying anyway? I always considered that odoriferous menthol coating on your skin to be free with the purchase of enough drinks—a sort of invisible car freshener for your body, or 25-cent bowling bathroom cologne without the need for spare change.

I remember when taking a girl to a bar and getting her drunk used to mean something—and condoms were something you just pretended to wear. But give me a tobacco AND tequila AND rufie flavored condom...and that's a complete night on the town. [hindlatex via theregister]

The thruster attaches to a table or other solid surface and has a "Highspeed piston," "Powerful movement" and a "High quality stabilizer". It's essentially a masturbation machine you control with that hand lever, which varies speed and intensity depending on how you like it.

Kanjo Toys claims that it's fantastic because you don't have to buy new "onacups" to put in it, which we're guessing means you're going to have to wash this when you're done. No word on whether it's dishwasher safe.

Better shot after the jump.

– Jason Chen

Robotech Thruster masturbation machine [Kanjotoys]

Prostitutes using the iPod Video to increase turnover [MusicGizmos]