Galactic Empire Begins Invasion of San Francisco

Informed by the Bush Administration that a Rebel base is located in the heart of San Francisco, Imperial forces surrounded the city in advance of a full-scale invasion. While Imperial Admiral Piett promised administration officials that the assault would commence only if the Rebel forces fail to surrender by 8PM PDT… » 8/16/08 6:30pm 8/16/08 6:30pm

Imperial Stormtroopers Arrest Santa, Emperor to Take Over Xmas

SANTA'S FACTORY, North Pole (Agencies) - An Imperial Stormtrooper commando broke into Santa's Factory on the North Pole yesterday evening, killing an undetermined number of elves, arresting the owner and confiscating his sled. Joe Kwazansky, local spokesman for the Evil Galactic Empire in Los Angeles, appeared in a… » 12/16/07 11:55am 12/16/07 11:55am