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New York, 8:32 AM
Mon Dec 21
25 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #kitchenartbuttermate more →

    Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Francis Nguyen Francis Nguyen
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    and i quote Mr. Alton Brown- "There's only one uni-tasker in my kitchen-- and thats my fire extinguisher"
     Reply
    Francis Nguyen was starred Francis Nguyen was unstarred
    Image of Con Seannery Con Seannery
    02/19/09

    @Francis Nguyen: Hey, now, you can use a fire extinguisher for many things. Cooling beer, making fog, having the world's best prank when someone walks in the door...
     Reply
    Con Seannery was starred Con Seannery was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE
    02/19/09

    @Con Seannery gives up on subtlety, BAN FACEBOOKERS!: Only if it's a CO2 Fire Extinguisher. Otherwise, you just gave someone a face full of powder a la the aliens from Signs.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was starred GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was unstarred
    Image of Peter Shultz Peter Shultz
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    Does this only work with East Coast Butter? If I can fit a stick of "Western stubby" in it then no thanks!!
     Reply
    Peter Shultz was starred Peter Shultz was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    02/19/09

    @Peter Shultz: Yeah, you're right. Butter comes in a different shape here on the W. Coast.


    WTF is up w/ that?

     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    02/19/09

    @Peter Shultz: This is a family site.


    No one wants to hear about your "Western stubby" or whether you can fit it into kitchen gadgets.

     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    Does this sliding scale help measure how much butta is in her buttaface?
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    02/19/09

    @Jrsy Devil's Food Cake: There's no sliding scale for buttaface. Everything below the neck must be "all good" or better. But her face...
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    02/19/09

    @Lite: thinks they will listen to Reason (tm): Oh, there are various degrees of ugly. I mean right off the top of my head I can name at least three; ugly, fugly and of course mfugly...
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    MMmmmmm.... butter makes it better.
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of fuzzymuffins fuzzymuffins
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    what about those who use 'tub' butter??
     Reply
    fuzzymuffins was starred fuzzymuffins was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE
    02/19/09

    @fuzzymuffins: Parkay?
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was starred GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    I tend to keep my butter frozen as I'm a Smart Balance fan for everything except baking. IT'S BAKING!
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was starred GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    I actually do not ingest much butter. My bad fat comes from one food.


    Any guesses?


    (-100 to any wrong answers and I am keeping track)

     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of PollockRoc PollockRoc
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: Babies?
     Reply
    PollockRoc was starred PollockRoc was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!:


    Bacon(including, but not limited to: of the explosion, -tini, salt, country style, etc.. variety)?

     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was starred GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was unstarred
    Image of nutbastard nutbastard
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!:


    Twinkies?

     Reply
    nutbastard was starred nutbastard was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    02/19/09

    @PollockRoc: Were I to eat babies, it would have to be Muppet Babies. I hate Muppet Babies. -100 for being wrong; -25 for reminding me of Muppet Babies.


    @bobojuice: Where would this unicorn bacon come from? Unicorns are part horse, part goat, part lion. None of those animals yield bacon. -100 for wrong and -2000 for not being up on unicorn facts.


    @Buckaroo_GitEmSteveDave: Really? You need a question mark? Like you don't know. I'm deducting -25 from you for not being sure. And not making you any sliders.


    @nutbastard: I eat one Twinkie per Olympiad. And I kind of like that they still contain beef tallow. -20 for making me want a Twinkie.


    @CaptainHoratioMcCallister: Sounds tasty. That's why I don't like my bacon too crispy. Good crisped fat has a light rich flavor.


    @Xeno: Self cannibalism is not in my list of vices. -100 for being wrong and -100 for being clever.

     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of 92BuickLeSabre 92BuickLeSabre
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: Deep-friend twinkees wrapped in baby unicorn (a/k/a ponies) bacon?
     Reply
    92BuickLeSabre was starred 92BuickLeSabre was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: Bacon Salted bacon wrapped bacon?
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: I'm pretty sure it's a pork based product but for some reason the name of it escapes me.....
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: Damn, I didn't mean for that question mark to stay in there. It was from something I took out. It was a Simpsons quote(about a magical creature), but I couldn't find a picture to fit, so I deleted it.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was starred GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    02/19/09

    @Lite: thinks they will listen to Reason (tm): When I made my Bacon Explosion, instead of BBQ rub on the bacon lattice, I used a seasoning mixture that included Bacon Salt.


    So, yes, I wrapped bacon in bacon salted with Bacon Salt. The universe remains intact.


    Also, I found that a Bacon Explosion is NOT "Why You're Fat" if properly served. Properly served means sliced thin and served as an hors d'ouerve. It's no worse than a terrine of country pate served with toast points and should be treated as such.

     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of Con Seannery Con Seannery
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: THESE!


    [foodproof.com]

     Reply
    Con Seannery was starred Con Seannery was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    02/19/09

    @Con Seannery gives up on subtlety, BAN FACEBOOKERS!: Not until next year, chum.


    And, you heard it here first: If the Giants go to the Super Bowl, I will prepare both a Bacon Explosion and a Bacon Cheese Roll.

     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: TONIGHT I AM TAKING UP THE GAUNTLET ONCE MORE.


    I AM GOING TO MAKE WHAT I WILL CALL A "FLAPJACK".


    BACON, BOURBON, MAPLE SYRUP, AND BITTERS.


    THERE WILL BE VIDEO.


     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: Still not as good as my Patented Space-Age Out of This World Moon Waffles.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was starred GitEmSteveDave_ My Brute Dojo Code CDIAFIFE was unstarred
    Image of Mark Wilson Mark Wilson
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: I'm actually with you on this. I'm not a huge butter guy, save for on a warm baguette. Pork fat ftw!
     Reply
    Mark Wilson was starred Mark Wilson was unstarred
    Image of TysonZetes TysonZetes
    02/19/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: I don't mean this in a negative way, but now I guess I do... If you have to ask an online forum to guess what you should not be eating and ACTUALLY EXPECT THEM TO KNOW, you dear sir, should join a social club offline, lol... Shit.
     Reply
    TysonZetes was starred TysonZetes was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    02/19/09

    @TysonZetes: He didn't ask us to name a food he shouldn't be eating. He asked us to name the food that he gets his daily requirement of bad fat intake from.


    And it's obvious how many people here already knew the correct answer (aside from their joke answers of course).


    You may want to now consider socializing offline yourself....

     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of A Snake a Snake... OH it's a Snake! A Snake a Snake... OH it's a Snake!
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    Looks like a dumptruck taking a shit.
     Reply
    A Snake a Snake... OH it's a Snake! was starred A Snake a Snake... OH it's a Snake! was unstarred
    Image of 92BuickLeSabre 92BuickLeSabre
    02/19/09

    @Arggh! there goes a...snake a snake! ohhhhhhhh it's snake!: Forgive me if I'm missing the obvious, but at some point doesn't every dumptruck look like a dumptruck taking a shit...hence the phrase...


    ...taking a dump

     Reply
    92BuickLeSabre was starred 92BuickLeSabre was unstarred
    Image of steegness steegness
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    There's keeping it simple, and then there's wrong. Two tablespoons = 1 stick? You mean eight, right?
     Reply
    steegness was starred steegness was unstarred
    Image of bosskev bosskev
    02/19/09

    @steegness: "Two tablespoons = 1 stick? You mean eight, right?"


    Thank you for pointing out the obvious error in his math. Yes, of course he meant eight, an obvious typo. Corrected, then, the conversion would be:

    Two tablespoons = 8 sticks


    Or, if you just want to round up, make it a full and hearty 10 sticks. At least, that's always how I've done it.


    * grumbles at the recent influx of dullards who can't recognize humor *

     Reply
    bosskev was starred bosskev was unstarred
    Image of Angry Star Angry Star
    02/19/09

    @steegness: he's kidding..
     Reply
    Angry Star was starred Angry Star was unstarred
    Image of Mark Wilson Mark Wilson
    02/19/09

    @NarcissuStar: Am I? AM I????
     Reply
    Mark Wilson was starred Mark Wilson was unstarred
    Image of Darrone Darrone
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    Is it just me or is this product of a forbidden love affair between a stapler and a measuring cup?
     Reply
    Darrone was starred Darrone was unstarred
    Image of nutbastard nutbastard
    02/19/09

    @Darrone:


    it's just you. you are the only thing that is the product of a forbidden love affair between a stapler and a measuring cup.

     Reply
    nutbastard was starred nutbastard was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    02/19/09

    @Darrone: It's just you. This product is clearly the culmination of one person with OCD and another who's totally anal retentive...
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of CaptainHoratioMcCallister CaptainHoratioMcCallister
    02/19/09

    In reply to Buttermate Ruins Butter with Math Class
    Also, butter has measurements already printed on it's wrapping so you can just cut at the line.
     Reply
    CaptainHoratioMcCallister was starred CaptainHoratioMcCallister was unstarred
    Image of Epoch Epoch
    02/19/09

    @CaptainHoratioMcCallister: that's too simple.


    the problem needed a more complex, marketable solution.

     Reply
    Epoch was starred Epoch was unstarred
    Image of Ghede Ghede
    02/19/09

    @CaptainHoratioMcCallister: Try doing that once the wrapping paper has been removed.
     Reply
    Ghede was starred Ghede was unstarred
    Image of Homerjay is utterly alone. Homerjay is utterly alone.
    02/19/09

    @Ghede: Don't remove the wrapper. Just cut through it.
     Reply
    Homerjay is utterly alone. was starred Homerjay is utterly alone. was unstarred
    Image of Homerjay is utterly alone. Homerjay is utterly alone.
    02/19/09

    @steegness: I think you're missing the humor.
     Reply
    Homerjay is utterly alone. was starred Homerjay is utterly alone. was unstarred
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