This is kind of like that, only dumber. Why he was trying to bull rush the door is anyone's guess, but for the sake of mankind I can only hope this guy doesn't graduate. [Digg]

At the conference, the scientists debated research limits on AI, much like their colleagues in genetics and biotechnology have done already with stems cells. Their thoughts were published this weekend under an ominous, dark cloud headline at the New York Times: "Scientists Worry Machines May Outsmart Man"

The location is actually an interesting bit of trivia, as Asilomar was host to a groundbreaking conference on genetics and biology in 1975. At that conference, scientists met to debate their new found ability to reshape life at the cellular level. As the Times notes, the conference ultimately led to guidelines for "recombinant DNA research" and a Nobel Prize for organizer Paul Berg.

Today's scientists are hoping to get similar guidelines into place for AI, although many worried openly that autonomous people-killing robots were here already.

But for every cautionary tale out of Asilomar these days, there's a detractor ready to debunk the warnings with a bit of what they believe to be common sense. Said startup guru and investor Chris Dixon (via Gawker's own Nick Denton, no less), "Is the nytimes serious? AI researchers I know are embarrassed by the lack of progress, not worried about too much."

Indeed, when Wilson chatted with Wired for War author PW Singer during our ominous Machines Behaving Deadly theme week, we learned that a Terminator uprising was unlikely to happen anytime soon because the "preconditions" simply weren't in place—yet.

"The Global Hawk drone may be able to take off on its own, fly on its own, but it still needs someone to put that gasoline in there," he said. Nevertheless, as Wilson added after that comment, "it's not hard to see how this precondition could eventually be overcome." No kidding.

Many of the details from this conference are still coming out, but from what we read today one could definitely infer that there was an ominous, cautious tone present throughout the proceedings. "I went in very optimistic about the future of A.I. and thinking that Bill Joy and Ray Kurzweil were far off in their predictions," said Tom Mitchell, a professor of AI and machine learning at Carnegie Mellon University. "[But] the meeting made me want to be more outspoken about these issues and in particular be outspoken about the vast amounts of data collected about our personal lives."

Sounds like a split decision. Who's afraid of some big bad AI now? [New York Times]

Mrs Trebilcock was inspecting a blender used to mix four tonnes of meat when she crouched beneath the machine to inspect a flap, where the load is discharged, to ensure it was clean.

But the flap closed suddenly with substantial force acting like a pair of 'scissors' cutting off the top of her head above the eyebrows.

Grim. Naturally DeliCo Ltd, the UK-based meat processing plant where the incident occurred, was found to be in breach of health and safety codes—a charge to which they have pleaded guilty. What's even more disturbing is that makes three machine murders in four days. Don't trust your gadgets people—especially your toaster (the most evil of all home appliances). [Daily Mail via Fark]

Case in point—math teacher and rugby coach Scott Williams was recently crushed to death when he fell asleep in an industrial garbage bin in Brighton, UK. His body was discovered more than 24 hours later by sanitation workers.

Seems like an open and shut case, but I still have to wonder whether or not the Boozy Shredder was involved somehow. Then again, could someone else be to blame? [The Argus via Fark]

Details on exactly what happened have not been determined, but we are not above jumping to wild and absurd conclusions. As Jason Chen put it "that's why TMNT cosplay should be illegal." [LA Times Image via Flickr]

The Blackberry, seated in his breast pocket, added the extra bit of thickness that made the difference between plummeting another 700 feet and waiting 2 hours for a rescue chopper.

While Fitzherbert hardly walked away unscathed—he suffered hypothermia, a broken jaw, nearly "ripped off" nose among other ailments—he was able to call his wife from the hospital...on the very phone that saved his life. [The Sun Thanks gitemstevedave!]

Adam took us through some of the worst manglings and murders committed by appliances, from pitching machines to prison toilets. Dan and Jack showed us that lawnmowers and pajama zippers can be pretty nasty, while Blam pointed out—with NSFW photographic evidence—that meat grinders are the surliest of the bunch.

The country's two most famous robotics authors enlightened us on future encounters with our robot overlords: PW Singer, author of Wired For War, walked us through exactly why Asimov's laws of robotics are so full of crap they'll never protect humans from cybernetic violence, though he later explained why the likelihood of a true Terminator-style takeover is slim.

Meanwhile, Daniel H. Wilson, author of How to Survive a Robot Uprising, showed us why two-legged humanoid robots would soon do our bidding on the battlefield.

The guest appearances continued, with MythBusters' Adam Savage dropping in to blow our minds about the fine art of electrocution, and why you probably shouldn't try it at home.

You all got in the game, voting on which robots were the most deadly in the humanoid and heavyweight divisions, and how the winner of each—Caprica 6 and Gort-would fare in a Battle Royale. 6 won, but since she received 756,000 votes, we're assuming foul play.

Naturally, we also stuck in the age-old question of a bout between Wall-E and Johnny 5, though Sean saved the scariest robots for last, in his TGIF roundup.

It was a good week, though somehow there was no comfort in learning that ordinary dumb gadgets are as deadly as—or deadlier than—robots trained to kill you. Especially when, at present, a 17-year-old Candian girl is our best bet in the war against the machines. [Machines Behaving Deadly]

This mashup by IGN, Transforminators, works on so many levels that it's almost scary. Then again, it probably explains a lot about the stylistic decisions made in Terminator Salvation. If you haven't ditched out for your extended weekend yet, kill some of the company's time...before the summer blockbusters kill you. [IGN]

Yeah, it's kind of like pitting a puppy vs a toddler...but I digress.

This tournament poll of the world's deadliest robots was proposed to us by our friend PW Singer, author of Wired for War: The Robotics Revolution and Conflict in the 21st Century which we covered last March. Stay tuned for more scary-ass robots wreaking havoc on fleshy humans and metallic adversaries alike.

Machines Behaving Deadly: A week exploring the sometimes difficult relationship between man and technology.

SimMan 3G: Intended as an instructional aid for aspiring doctors, SimMan can reproduce human reactions like crying, bleeding, convulsions, and even cardiac arrest. And, as you can see, his intense creepiness is sure to eliminate any students that might not be able to cope. [Link]

Cabbage Patch Spider-Bot: This DIY spider-bot takes the inherently creepy Cabbage Patch Kid and intensifies it a million-fold. [Make via Link]

Gakutensoku: Designed 80 years ago for Emperor Showa (aka Hirohito), this robot was recently restored with a $200,000 computer-controlled pneumatic servo system. It can tilt its head, blink, smile and puff up its chest and cheeks with a system of inflatable rubber tubes. Check out that evil grin at about the 1:40 mark (*shudder*). [Link]

Lucy: Steve Grand's infamous "Lucy" orangutan robot was an attempt at simulating the mind of a human baby.What he managed to create is an affront to all things good and holy. [Link Image via Streeb-Greebling]

Saya: Humanoid robots interacting with children is just plain creepy—and Saya here isn't helping much with her appearance. Using 18 motors and some complex programming, Saya can express emotions, speak several different languages, take roll-call and assign tasks to her elementary school students. [Link]

Yume Neko Smile: Intended to provide all of the benefits of owning a real cat without all of the drawbacks of taking care of a living, breathing creature, Yume Neko Smile adds the character-building element of terror that children so desperately need these days. [Link]

Simroid: Like the SimMan, Simroid is designed as a learning aid—although the objective here is to train dentists. It reacts like a human would in most situations—except when sexually abused. Dentists trying that in the real world are often met with swift and severe punishment. [Link]

WD-2: This shape-shifting robot can quickly change faces using an array of servos and microcontrollers. It's only a matter of time before these things infiltrate human society, becoming whoever they want, whenever they want. [Link]

Geminoid: Designed as a realistic, robotic doppelganger for Hiroshi Ishiguro, a professor at Osaka University, the Geminoid can be remote controlled from anywhere—allowing the professor to, essentially, be in two places at once. [Wired]

CB2: Quite possibly the creepiest robot on this list, Child Robot with Biomimetic Body (CB2) uses complex computers, 197 sensors, eye-cameras and 51 pneumatic "muscles" to learn like a human child. It taught itself to recognize facial expressions, follow the gaze of it's "mother" and even walk and talk. That's pretty impressive, but after looking at this video it becomes clear that the only course of action is to take it out back with a shotgun before it learns to kill. [Link]

Being on death row is lonely, so having a TV is important to your sanity. Godwin's was on the fritz, so he decided to multitask by trying to fix it while using the commode.

The last stupid decision of his life was to bite down on an exposed wire in the plugged-in TV while sitting on the metal toilet. He was electrocuted instantly, making his own kind of electric chair and saving the state the trouble.

Machines Behaving Deadly: A week exploring the sometimes difficult relationship between man and technology.

Stay tuned later today for a special bonus round between two loveable robots completely unsuited for combat. The question of the century will finally be answered.

This tournament poll of the world's deadliest robots was proposed to us by our friend PW Singer, author of Wired for War: The Robotics Revolution and Conflict in the 21st Century which we covered last March. Stay tuned for more of the tournament, more from Singer, and for more scary-ass robots wreaking havoc on fleshy humans and metallic adversaries alike.

Machines Behaving Deadly: A week exploring the sometimes difficult relationship between man and technology.

Think about it: It's a formula designed to let a machine essentially wriggle around inside your head to extract your true intentions—intentions you might not even realize you have yet—to reveal them to the company bean counters, who are basically machines themselves. Who can then take the Pre-Crime approach and shitcan you before you quit—if you were really going to quit at all.

Google developed the algorithm in response to its best employees bailing, so presumably at least some of the unhappy people would be wooed, not written off. But this is just the beginning. Today, a computer knows if you're going to quit. Next, a computer calculates if you should be hired at all. Which is only a few generations removed from determining if all people shouldn't be fired, but like, permanently. From earth.

The uprising is coming, and Google will be where it begins. [WSJ]

There are more detailed shots below, in the gallery, but do not blame me if you vomit.

From Wikipedia:

A meat grinder or meat mincer is a kitchen appliance for grinding, fine mincing or mixing raw or cooked meat, fish, vegetables or similar food. It replaces tools like the mincing knife, for example, which has been used to produce minced meat, filling etc. The producer puts the minced food into a funnel, which is placed on the top of the grinder. From there the material goes on a horizontal screw conveyor. This screw conveyor, that can be powered by a hand wheel or an electric motor, squashes and partially mixes the food. At the end of the screw conveyor there is a knife installed directly in front of the fixed hole plate. At this opening the minced meat comes out of the machine. The fineness of the meat depends on the size of the holes of the plate.

Four out of Five Gizmodo editors didn't have the stomach to post this. I can't say I blame them.

[where else?]

Keep in mind that the final showdown between the winner of the Humanoid Class and the Heavyweight Class will go down tomorrow, so make sure to cast your votes for the matchup you would like to see most.

This tournament poll of the world's deadliest robots was proposed to us by our friend PW Singer, author of Wired for War: The Robotics Revolution and Conflict in the 21st Century which we covered last March. Stay tuned for more of the tournament, more from Singer, and for more scary-ass robots wreaking havoc on fleshy humans and metallic adversaries alike.

Machines Behaving Deadly: A week exploring the sometimes difficult relationship between man and technology.

So, what are the preconditions, according to Singer?

1. The AI or robot has to have some sense of self-preservation and ambition, to want power or fear the loss of power.

2. The robots have to have eliminated any dependence on humans.

3. Humans have to have omitted failsafe controls, so there's no ability to turn robots or AI off.

4. The robots need to gain these advantages in a way that takes humans by surprise.

At the moment, says Singer, these conditions do not exist. "In the Terminator movies, Skynet gets super intelligence, figures the humans are going to eventually shut it down, thinks, 'I better strike first.'" However, in today's army, "we're building robots specifically to go off and get killed." He adds, "No one is building them to have a survival instinct—they're actually building them to have the exact opposite."

As far as human dependence, robots may do more and more human dirty work, but robots still need the meatbags to handle their dirty laundry. "The Global Hawk drone may be able to take off on its own, fly on its own, but it still needs someone to put that gasoline in there." Still, it's not hard to see how this precondition could eventually be overcome.

The failsafe discussion is surprisingly two sided. "It seems rather odd that people who grew up watching Terminator in the movie theaters wouldn't think, 'Hmm, maybe we should have a turn-off switch on there.'" But on the other hand, "brilliant AI could just figure a way around it." Besides, "we don't want to make the failsafe all that easy, because we don't want a robot that comes up to Bin Laden that he can just shut off by reaching around the back and hitting the switch."

We of course assume that robots will never gain the element of surprise. "You don't get super-intelligent robots without first having semi-super-intelligent robots, and so on. At each one of these stages, someone would push back." The scary thing is, Singer does acknowledge that the exponential growth of super-smart machines may indeed catch us by surprise eventually. "By the end it's happening too quickly for people to see."

No matter what preconditions are prevented deliberately, there is a point on every futurist's timeline where computers become "smarter" than humans, in terms of sheer brain capability, and no matter what happens up till that point, the game then changes completely. "In the Terminator movies, Skynet both tricks and coerces people into doing its bidding." How do we stop that from happening?

"Some people say, 'Let's just not work on these systems. If they're so many things coming out of this that are potentially dangerous, why don't we just stop?'" says Singer. "We could do that, as long as we also stop war, capitalism and the human instinct for science and invention." [More from my interview with PW Singer]

Machines Behaving Deadly: A week exploring the sometimes difficult relationship between man and technology.

The robot's upper torso disengaged its legs after a particularly brutal uppercut.

"I'm so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark."-Muhammad Ali

"I'm the most recognized and loved man that ever lived cuz there weren't no satellites when Jesus and Moses were around, so people far away in the villages didn't know about them."-Muhammad Ali

[What This Actually Is via BBG]

On one hand, kittens are organic lifeforms, presumably loyal to other organic lifeforms. On the other, kittens grow into cats. And for thousands of years, cats have refused to follow the human code.

What I postulate is a future in which there is a sort of war trifecta. It will be Man vs. Machine vs. Kittens. And with the feline world showing up as an insane wild card, anything can happen...though in the immortal words of John Connor, the outcome is most likely that, "We are dead!! We are all dead!! Because of kittens!!!" [Cute Overload]

Machines Behaving Deadly: A week exploring the sometimes difficult relationship between man and technology.