What they made this time is what they're calling "soggy pork," which is fake pig muscle that's pretty gross because it's never been exercised. But once they figure out how to tone it up in the lab, you'll be looking at guilt-free pork chops.

And it's amazing news, really. Not only will vegetarians get to enjoy the deliciousness that is meat without guilt, but it'll do wonders for the environment. Do you realize how horrible the beef industry is for ol' Mother Nature? Very, very horrible. If we could replace all those factory farmed animals with slabs of meat rolling off an assembly line, we'd be doing the planet and animals a whole lot of good.

That is, provided it tastes good. If it doesn't, no one will eat it, and this will all be for naught. So make sure it's succulent, scientists! [Telegraph via Boing Boing]

Taste Test is our weeklong tribute to the leaps that occur when technology meets cuisine, spanning everything from the historic breakthroughs that made food tastier and safer to the Earl-Grey-friendly replicators we impatiently await in the future.

Meat Ship - Meat House and Meat Ship creator, Joel Richards, also contributed to TIWYF, the book, where he explained his inspiration for building meat-structures — to create his first meat structure, the meat ship, he actually used the help of his roommate, an engineering major!

Leaning Tower of NOM - A tall dome-like structure of donuts and crullers that is probably more structurally sound than its leaning Tuscan counterpart.

Meat House - It's like a gingerbread house, but many more animals were killed to build it.

Meat Tank - The meat tank is a glorious mystery, it was submitted anonymously and we have yet to uncover its origins. It combines two intensely manly things: an armoured combat vehicle and...MEAT!
Rubix Cubewich - The geniuses at insanewiches.com came up with this supremely nerdy gem and explain its contents here.

Bacon Wrapped Stone Henge - There's something weirdly appropriate about this culinary ode to a site of ritual sacrifice: a bacon offering to the gods! The creator also takes it rather seriously.

BA-K47 - A past favorite of Giz, also part of the book's spread on meat-creations.

The Bacone - Bacon Camp's Bacone seems simple enough, but it actually involved a good amount of ingenuity on the part of its creators. They also contributed to the book, explaining how they came up with the idea that took California's "Bacon Camp" competition by storm. They also talk about their creation here.

Bacon Man - The Bacon Man: attempting to fill the uncanny valley with salty deliciousness! Definitely one of the more creepy items, but also impressive in its construction...

Snack Stadium - The snack stadium has managed to harness all that is good and manly: 1) sporting events 2) building shit with tools 3) tailgating snack foods 4) competition.
After HolyTaco created the original, many have attempted to recreate, redesign and re-imagine their own versions (like this image, which is a redesigned version that is exclusive to our book). Not just a feat of food engineering, a phenomenon!

The Fresh Label design works by detecting ammonia emanating from the product within and fading out accordingly. Once the ammonia level reaches a level deemed unsafe, the label will no longer be readable. It's a clever system that can't easily be manipulated, and provided it's reasonably cost-efficient, we could see it being adopted in large scale. Until then, follow the same rule as when choosing a possibly-dirty shirt from the laundry pile: If it smells funky, put it back. [Swiss Miss via Serious Eats

Mrs Trebilcock was inspecting a blender used to mix four tonnes of meat when she crouched beneath the machine to inspect a flap, where the load is discharged, to ensure it was clean.

But the flap closed suddenly with substantial force acting like a pair of 'scissors' cutting off the top of her head above the eyebrows.

Grim. Naturally DeliCo Ltd, the UK-based meat processing plant where the incident occurred, was found to be in breach of health and safety codes—a charge to which they have pleaded guilty. What's even more disturbing is that makes three machine murders in four days. Don't trust your gadgets people—especially your toaster (the most evil of all home appliances). [Daily Mail via Fark]

Made to reassure the public about the safety and quality of McDonald's meat, this tour of one of their meat providers' factories is interesting, partly because of the complex, bewildering preparations that the beef patties go through and the amazing machines that do the work, but mostly because of how much the procedure resembles that child-grinding scene from The Wall.

The video has it all: masked employees earnestly voicing the virtues their "USDA-inspected" product while behind them, a torrent of beef spews out of a giant mechanical meat-hole onto a speeding conveyor belt; tubs, pipes and boxes of various sizes and shapes carrying a roiling mass of beef slurry; countless, mysterious processing chambers, each of which does who knows what else to the patties.

The final step of the process: after all the processing, grinding, forming and freezing, the last device the patties pass through before packaging is a metal detector. In other words, go to McDonald's, because your Big Mac is practically guaranteed not to have a lug nut in it.

It's not that this is necessarily surprising, it's just that we're used to companies keeping this kind of thing as out of view as possible. So some credit is due to McD's, I guess? Witness all the mechanical wonder/horror here. [McDonald's—Thanks, Albert!]

There are upsides to this, such as engineering extra vitamins and nutrition into meat so you don't have to eat vegetables AT ALL if you don't want to. Or take out some of the fat and bad stuff for you. Or in PETA's own smug, condescending words, "consumers who can't get enough cholesterol and saturated fat in their diet could indulge their cravings without harming animals." [PETA via Wired Science via DVICE]

The Flikr page reads, "Heck, it's Texas, what did you expect?" Nothing less, Texas. Nothing less, whatsoever. [Flickr via Born Rich]

Overall, it seems like a much better test than the one I've been using, which involves just eating it and going to the hospital if the meat isn't good. It's not as subtle as the red light, but who wants subtlety when it comes to cooking their meat? –Adam Frucci

Product Page [via Red Ferret]

What there is technology for is a thermometer that talks to tell you when your meat is done being cooked. The Oregon Scientific Talking Wireless BBQ/Oven Thermometer proves that the pleasant sounds of "Your rare steak is done" are much nicer than the disembodied screams of a slaughtered bovine. What's even nicer is that you can have it tell you that your food is ready in Spanish, German, French, or even Danish if you so desire. Jeres kød er beredvillig! –Adam Frucci

The QCard sensor needs to be replaced every two months, which are $9.95 for a pair. The SensorfreshQ itself is $89.95, and should pay for itself the first time you don't have to go to the emergency room. – Jason Chen

Product page [Sharper Image via Shiny Shiny]

The skewers come in a bunch of flavors, including Bourbon, Thai Coconut Lime and good ol' garlic herb. They're available online now from specialty cooking stores and will be in other stores soon. Ten skewers cost $7.99, a small price to pay for perfectly seasoned meats. – Nicholas Deleon

Seasoned Skewers [MySecretPantry.com via Cool Hunting]