We gave up on Kickstarter a few months ago; too many unfulfilled orders of too many far-fetched concepts. It's the internet's biggest—and most expensive—letdown, to be honest. Unless, of course, it's being used to help Michael Bay bring the Bad Boys franchise back with aliens and explosions and oh gawd why can't this…

Can you imagine the devastation caused by a morning swig of the "Bay in a can" energy drink? Urban Outfitters would have to amp production of denim shorty-shorts to dangerous levels at the very least. [YouTube — Thanks, Nick!]

In the timeless masterpiece Armageddon, by auteur Michael Bay, Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck were sent into space to blow up an asteroid headed straight for Earth. Now, in real life, scientists are going to do the same thing.

It's hard being Michael Bay, what with all the money he needs to count and women he needs to objectify. Plus, one shitty, loud, oversaturated three-hour car commercial is as good as the next, so you can't really blame the guy for re-using footage from one in another. He's got robot testicles to design! Frankly, the…

Michael Bay's EXPLOSIVE movie has appeared online in HD, non-bootlegged format. And there's nary a Shia LaBeouf in sight! Hurrah! Released next July, the clip shows Transformers were present at the Apollo 11 moonwalk. Oh Michael Bay... [Transformers via CrunchGear]

Turn those personal keepsakes into a scene from a Michael Bay movie. Which movie? Any movie! It really doesn't matter, with the Bayifier generator tool. Just don't be too heavy-handed with the LaBeouf heads, mmkay? [Bayifier via PreSurfer via io9]

Michael Bay isn't talentless. After all, he gave us the first Transformers movie. No no, MIchael Bay is a genius. The catch is that he's also an insidious prankster.

Each day I get a little bit sadder that Billy Mays is no longer with us. Good thing there are so many spokeassholes vying for position in the marketing pantheon.

Here you go, a new Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen video. It's about a minute of stuff blowing up, a minute of Bumblebee whining, and 30 seconds of Megan Fox.