The best part is, those are conservative estimates. According to Psystar's aggressive predictions, the company planned to move 12 million computers by 2011. 12 million! That's a far cry from the triple digit numbers they managed to sell.

The other best part is that Psystar pitched their inevitable legal battle with Apple as a competitive advantage, claiming other companies would want to stay away from that mess. Imagine asking the bank for a loan on a truck, saying you'll use it to haul stolen TVs, and arguing that fear of getting arrested will make yours the only TV truck in town. No wonder these guys are going under.

The documents were provided as part of the upcoming injunction proceedings, where Apple is trying to halt sales of Psystar's products. Hey Apple, I know this is all about protecting your IP and all, but going by those dismal figures, you really don't have to worry about Psystar's sales. [Computer Wold via BGR]

All of Psystar's motions for summary judgment were denied, while all of Apple's were granted. That means that Apple got exactly what they wanted, while Psystar got exactly what they didn't want.

Don't worry, there will be a trial. According to Groklaw, the court still needs to determine (*deep breath*):

Apple's allegations of breach of contract; induced breach of contract, trademark infringement; trademark dilution; trade dress infringement; and state unfair competition under California Business and Professions Code § 17200; and common law unfair competition.

Phew! So yeah, at this point it's looking less like a trial to determine Psystar's legitimacy, more like a trial to decide how much they owe Apple.

Now, I'm no lawyer, but from where I'm standing this case is looking pretty grim for Psystar. I'll leave it to you legal eagles to explain exactly what all this means in the comments, because all I know is that it can't be good. [Groklaw via 9 to 5 Mac, image via walknboston]

Apple's rumored multi-touch tablet device demos Towers of War, a new Tower Defense game by Conniption Entertainment.

No excuse. No caveat. No "hahahaha we are so funny note." Just that.

So yes, let's all play a tower defense game, Conniption Entertainment. Here is how: You dress up as a tower and you defend yourself against me and the readers hitting you on the head and ribs using the

[Thanks MarkGurman.com]

The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.
This comes despite the failure of Psystar and the fact that there are several options out there for DIY hackintoshing. Nonetheless, the website is expected open by Monday, offering OS X Leopard pre-installed PCs for less than $900. As for the retail store, it was set to open at 2401 West Main Street, Alhambra, California on June 1st—and at least one Tuaw reader has confirmed that it is up and running. I suppose it goes without saying, but I would avoid these morons like the plague. [CNET via Tuaw, Wired]

Under Federal bankruptcy protection laws, all cases against the company should be put on hold. This means that Apple will have to wait on their case against Psystar. The first bankruptcy hearing will be held in Florida next June 5. At that time, we may find who the hell are the financial backers behind the company.

But while all this happens, the keep selling machines on their site. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't get near these guys even while wearing a biochemical war suit. [Mac Observer]

Hope as I may, this video is way, way too dumb to be some kind of viral ad for Lenovo. So, guy, here's some of that attention you wanted, I guess! [Macenstein]

Netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook, netbook. Netbook.

Much love,
Giz

p.s. Netbook.

[Gearlog]

To start with, dork n mero uno—hairdresser Barney Jones—wasn't being interviewed for a documentary on the first Jedi Church of England. He was filming himself, "fighting" with "lightsabers" in the garden, probably while being watched by Yoda, Mace Windu, Obi Wan, and the rest of their imaginary pals, who actually were the only ones with actual girlfriends in the backyard at the time.

Vader, whose real name is not Anakin Skywalker but Arwel Wynne Hughes, pleaded guilty, saying in his defense that he had a "chronic alcohol problem" and he didn't remember anything at all. According to the two Joneses, however, Hughes jumped in the gardent shouting "DARTH VADER," wielding a metal crutch, wearing a helmet, a black bin bag, a cape, and with a lot of wine in his stomach. Laughing—presumably hysterically, like anyone would do after consuming "the best part of a 10-litre box of wine"—he proceeded to bang Barney Jones on the head, before smacking the thigh of family nerd cousin, Michael Jones.

With almost a box of wine in his body, Vader didn't remember a single thing, but his defense attorney said alcohol was "ruining his life." On the other side, the prosecution added that the two cousins "believe very strongly in the church and their religion."

We can only hope the judge will set Vader free and put those two in jail. [BBC News]

NEVER GETS OLD. I say.

This wasn't a joke. This was serious.

No, crimper Master Hehol, this is not serious. This is just sad. Reportedly, the drunk Vader was neither a Gizmodo editor nor Eddie Izzard:

Again you ask? YES! [Daily Telegraph]

Note: for some reason, I first read wrench and did this image:

And then I got hungry, and had to do this one:

"Sure the proceedure was expensive, but when I think of all the time I save by being able to use modern handhelds so much faster, I really think the surgery will pay for itself in ten to fifteen years...that's priceless." Too bad it makes the big man's hands look "effeminate." I'm not sure I believe this story, but if it's real, I want photos of the tranny hands. UPDATE: Phil over at Apple 2.0 writes that this is a satire piece. Fine, I figured, but honestly, if they wanted to write satire, and not an internet myth, they probably should have gone over the top with the quotes. What they don't get is that with some Apple fans going far enough to get tattoos, this wasn't such an unbelievable jump. [NorthDenverNews]

Leave it to that nest of fat bureaucrats called the European Union to fix what a consortium of eight European companies have not been able to pull off: Galileo, a former excommunicated astronomer turned global positioning system, is in a "dead-end street".

The 30-satellite system promised extreme accuracy to everyone around the world without the limitations of the US-government-controlled GPS. According to German Transport Minister Wolfgang Tiefensee, now it "is going through a deep and grave crisis" which, for those of you outside the Old Continent, means: "we are in deep shit."

The companies in charge of running the show have been unsuccessful and, with only one test satellite in orbit and the second one still grounded with technical troubles, it looks like the European taxpayer (that's me, for one) will have to pony up those funny colored bills to finance their incompetence. Quite frankly, I didn't need a GPS to tell me that we are completely lost this side of the pond. – Jesus Diaz

Galileo system 'in a deep crisis' [BBC News]

Just how Shaw thinks he's going to get PVR manufacturers to cooperate with this "request" is not revealed, but we're certain there must be some serious arm-twisting going on behind the scenes. In the meantime, TiVo users, you're probably aware that the following key combination will activate a hidden, semi-secret easter egg, a 30-second skip function: Select Play Select 3 0 Select. For a 60-second skip, just key in Select Play Select 3 0 Select Select Play Select 6 0 Select. Just trying to be helpful.

Anyway, killing ad skipping? Let's just see them try. The bastards! There would be a revolt, no question. – Charlie White

ABC wants to kill DVR ad-skipping [Ad Jab, via The Consumerist]