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Original material is licensed under a Creative Commons License permitting non-commercial sharing with attribution.
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09
Do those Proton Packs also function as liposuction machines?
02/06/09
I want latex man boobs..
02/06/09
People keep getting on the subway before letting others off. It's fucking unprofessional. Who the fuck do these people think they are?! I just want to get off the fucking subway and these pieces of shit won't let me off?! Fucking assholes! Where did they learn their manners?!
Then I get there and everyone fucking smells! BAD!!! You're in public, you idiots! WHY CAN'T YOU WEAR FUCKING DEODORANT?! IT'S FUCKING INCONSIDERATE!
The line at the concession stand is too fucking long! I just want a Diet Coke! FUCK!!! Why do these assholes feel the need to order 15 hotdogs and 12 fries?! CAN'T YOU FUCKING GO MORE THAN 3 HOURS WITHOUT STUFFING YOUR FACE?!!!
...
I'm.... I'm sorry. I'm a little hypoglycemic. I tried to get one of those free Grand Slam breakfasts at Denny's but they wouldn't seat me. And then I got in a shouting match with the manager.
Plus, crowds set me off. But still, these people aren't fucking professional.
02/06/09
No....
You're supposed to say, "I'm the Goddamn BATMAN!"
02/06/09
Saw movie poster in Flushing Avenue Station. Featured woman in blue dress with artificial breasts promoting marrying millionaires. The wicked will bask in their sex and greed, and the city is dying, like a rodent in the desert with cancer in its brain while hemorrhaging bodily fluids in the cruel unrelenting sand. Need drink, something potent. Beer will do, until I can satiate blood lust. The MTA will look up and shout "save us", and I'll whisper "Free Unlimited Metrocard, and you have yourself a deal"
02/06/09
Much better then I was going to do anyways so its all for the best.
02/06/09
Who the fuck do you think you are?! Do I go to your fucking office and correct you while you're doing whatever the fuck it is you do?! I don't! But I probably fucking should! Because whatever the fuck it is that you do, I fucking bet you're doing it fucking wrong!
You're fucking unprofessional!
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09
Yes, I am also unprofessional! I make no apologies for it.
Hey this is fun. I think I want to be Christian Bale for Halloween this year..
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09
I want to go, but don't want to go. I want to dress up, but don't want to dress up. I want to go there and cry, and yell, in my best comic book guy voice "Eeeepa! EEEeeeepa!"
And then I'd compose myself, make sure my four insignia pins signifying my rank are in order, straighten my Type 2 phaser, and be on my way.
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09
02/06/09