Like Giz reader Brian, who had this sweet post-xmas story to tell us about his dad:

I went back to MI to my parent's place this year for Christmas. My dad's gift this year was a new 10 mega pixel digital camera with all the bells and whistles.

While helping him figure out his new gadget I thought it would be fun to put pictures on the nice Kodak digital photo frame that I gave them for Christmas last year. So I ask my dad, "where is your digital frame"? Imagine my confusion when he points the frame out to me. See attached files.

God bless them. Reminds me of my beloved mother-in-law, who refers to her MacBook as "the television".

Do you have any funny stories with your parents or grandparents you would like to share? Send them our way. [Thanks Brian]

That's what the chain gets for serving beer to parents already trying to cope with brats and arcade machine sound effects for hours on end. Not to mention the 30 minute performance of the Rocka-fire explosion animatronic band, playing on a 30 minute loop. Also, throw in the parental insincts to protect your kid from being sat on by the fat kid in the ball pit, and you've basically tossed a match to the powder keg.

The environment also brings out what security experts call the "mama-bear instinct." A Chuck E. Cheese's can take on some of the dynamics of the animal kingdom, where beasts rush to protect their young when they sense a threat.

Parents aren't able to contain their blood lust anymore, put under the pressure of this scenario, and it is happening in Chuck E. Cheeses all over the country, in statistically significant numbers, according to various local police officers. Finally, a mainstream paper, the WSJ, reports what I've known since I worked there as a teen: Chuck E Cheese is pure evil. Here's are the blow by blows of a few particularly gruesome fights, including one involving 85 people:

Chuck E. Cheese's Blotter

Brookfield, Wisc.: April 5, 2008

Seven Brookfield Police officers broke up a fight that involved as many as 40 people, according to police reports. The altercation broke out after an uninvited guest showed up at a child's birthday party. No one was arrested. (See police report.)

Flint, Mich.: Jan. 26, 2008

Flint Township police responded to a call about a large fight at Chuck E. Cheese's that involved as many as 85 people, according to police reports. A fight inside the restaurant between three females erupted, pepper gas was sprayed and people flooded outside the restaurant into the back parking lot. (See police report.)

Toledo, Ohio: Feb. 4, 2007

Police responded to the scene after a fight broke out. Several parents complained about children who were having their picture drawn at one of the machines and then continued to sit there after the drawings were complete. Parents began calling names and then throwing punches. Several people were injured and several cited for disorderly conduct. (See police report.)

Matteson, Ill.: 2007-2008

Police have responded to 12 disturbance calls at Chuck E. Cheese in the last year, said a local law enforcement official. The disturbances ranged in seriousness and included one in which two men attacked another man at a birthday party.

Milwaukee, Wisc.: Aug. 11, 2006

Upon officers' arrival at a south side Chuck E. Cheese's, they spoke with a male who stated that during a verbal argument, an elderly female threw a shoe at him, according to police reports. He stated the fight started over someone calling his child "ugly." He stated he was not injured, his pride was just hurt.

Topeka, Kan.: Jan. 17, 2005

Topeka Police responded to a disturbance call around 5:30 p.m., according to a department spokeswoman. Two adult females were involved in an altercation prior to police arrival. It was reported that one small child was either bumped or stuck by another child. The mothers of the girls began to argue and an altercation ensued. No one was charged.

In Pennsylvania, Susquehanna Township police are searching for suspects involved in a Nov. 9 altercation at a Chuck E. Cheese's outside Harrisburg. The police department gets called to respond to disputes at the restaurant as many as 15 times a year, Police Chief Robert Martin says.

This most recent assault, described in police reports, occurred after a woman in her 30s approached a 6-year-old boy who was playing a videogame. When the boy went to insert more tokens to continue playing, the woman grabbed the tokens out of his hand and told him to stop hogging the game. The boy went and got his 26-year-old mother, who walked over to the woman. The woman began screaming at the boy's mother, and another suspect, a man in his 30s, grabbed the mother by the throat and pushed her against the videogame machine. CEC employees had to pull the man off the mother. Both the man and the woman fled the scene.

How they plan on fixing it:

In Milwaukee, the store posted a sign outlining a dress code that prohibits what it calls "gang-style apparel." That location also implemented a code of conduct that prohibits knives, chains, screwdrivers and glass cutters.

While the chain is a breeding ground for these fights, this police captain says it best:

"The biggest problem is you have a bunch of adults acting like juveniles," says Town of Brookfield Police Capt. Timothy Imler. "There's a biker bar down the street, and we rarely get calls there."

Here's another fight I found on youtube:
[UPDATE: video removed because it was posted by some white supremacy group, and screw that!]

[WSJ]

It reminds me of a funny story that happened to my wife's grandma a few years back. Her television was hit by a power surge and began speaking Spanish (picking up some AM radio station probably)...even when unplugged. She later joked that the voices, temporarily muffled under a blanket, were laughing at her. We convinced her that she'd just hit the wrong button. OK, OK, we didn't. We're not that cruel. [bookofjoe]

A simple tool that lets you manage how much time your kids spend on their Xbox 360. Manage in daily or weekly increments. Easy for parents to suspend and add time. Available in December 2007 only through Xbox Live.

The requisite photo of the pamphlet is obligatorily blurry, but with all of the other chatter floating around, even if this is faked, we feel pretty safe betting on the new feature's upcoming launch, particularly given the Xbox 360's new family-focused marketing, like with the Arcade. [Xbox Today via Kotaku, Flickr]

Ryder caught a ride from his mom's friend to go meet the "hitman," and offered up his stepdad's pickup as payment. He was quickly taken into custody where he is being held for attempted murder. While I'm sure every "parents with too much free time" group will use this to pin all of society's problems on videogames, Ryder's commitment to his PlayStation cannot be questioned. [The Times UK via PS3 Forums]

Not only is this eavesdropping paraphernalia downright scary, but the clueless hosts' approval of each spy tool sends a chill down my spine. My 14-year-old daughter would never speak to me again if I pulled any of these stunts. [The Morning Show]

Great, this is what we need. Children with guns learning how to aim and shoot. Then we can sit back and wonder what is happening to our country with kids killing kids......what's next? Could we make it squirt blood, too" one reader commented.

A "very concerned grandparent" wrote: "....Why don't they enclose an application to the NRA in every box as well....the marketing person who came up with this brain child of an idea should be fired."

Another reader commented, "I think it's irresponsible for Wii to come out with a controller that looks like a gun so kids can play games simulating shooting. What kind of message are we sending as parents when we buy these things for our kids?"

Useful for watching that your kids don't shove gadgets up their nose, but even more useful as it has a built-in radio. You have to watch them, but you don't have to listen to them. – Jason Chen

Product Page [Magnet via Shiny Shiny]

Numimed is also the perfect pacifier for the late 1990s raver in your household. Make sure you have an ample supply of liquid MDMA loaded up and you're set for the night. Overheating and dying? Not with that built-in thermometer! Keep your cool, club kids. They go for $5.99 and seem to be available at the local Walgreens or CVS pharmacy.

The Dispenser Pacifier [Red Ferret]