Groklaw has an explanation of the history of sudo and details about the patent, but it all boils down to this: Someone at the US Patent Office must've been snoozing when they approved this patent application. Either that or the command worked on a person. [USPTO via Groklaw]

Photo by xkcd

The problem with screen keyboards is that you actually have to look at the screen to hit the keys correctly. With real keyboards, touch typists have a physical reference to position their hands. That's why they type blind. With a flat screen keyboard, however, you lose the physical reference frame.

The patent for this screen keyboard, however, uses multitouch technology to automatically align the keys to the position of the hand. Since the keys are always in the same relative position to your fingers, you will always have a physical point of reference: Your own hand. That way, you can blindingly hammer your keys against the screen, knowing that your fingers will always hit the keys they are aiming for.

The patent also details the way this virtual keyboard would appear anywhere on the screen: Just place your hands as you would normally do while typing, and the keyboard will pop up. [USPTO via WMPowerUser]

A viewer selects a media program to view by use of a remote controller with networking capability.

Upon the viewer wishing to send a blog posting to a blog, the viewer determines whether a tag to be included in the blog posting is to be a pre-existing tag or a custom tag, wherein the blog posting comprises program information about the media program useful to identify the media program. If the tag is to be a pre-existing tag, the viewer selects the pre-existing tag from a plurality of pre-existing tags using the remote controller and if the tag is to be a custom tag, the viewer generates the custom tag using the remote controller.

If a protocol provided by the remote controller to send the blog posting to the blog allows a snapshot of the media program to be included in the blog posting, the remote controller takes the snapshot of the media program and includes it in the blog posting.

So, the device would let you blog or tweet and communicate with your followers about what you are watching via a networked remote control. Again, it's only a patent at this point, but is this remote something you could see yourself using? [Patent via BaltTech via TechCrunch]

Sony's PS3 emotion-detecting patent would ostensibly work by picking up physical cues like laughter, though we're not exactly sure how it'll detect some of the other emotions it claims to, including sadness, boredom, joy, excitement and anger. It's kind of a cool idea—a game could adjust to your growing frustration by decreasing the difficulty before you heave the PS3 out the window in a fit of rage, for example. But if they plan on using humor, they better get out of the Humor Stone Age where the butt-kick wheel resides. May I suggest Glenn Beck, Fox News' fantastic up-and-coming satirist? [Joystiq]

Along with ex-Microsoft CTO Nathan Myhrvold, Gates has applied for five patents that call for a fleet of specially equipped vessels to be deployed in a hurricane's path—vessels that are capable of reducing the surface temperature of the ocean by mixing in colder water from greater depths. This would reduce the heat-driven condensation that fuels hurricanes.

Of course, significantly altering the surface temperature of a large body of water is going to require many, many ships...a reality that is not lost on Gates. In the patent filings, there are a few proposals on how an endeavor like this one could be financed—including selling insurance policies in areas that are prone to major storms. While I seriously doubt the plausibility of such a scheme, if anyone can pull it off it would be Bill Gates. Besides, even if this doesn't work out he always has his important work with high tech kegs to fall back on. [Patent via Tech Flash via Slashdot via PopSci]

In all likelihood, Funai will appeal the ruling—but outside of a courtroom miracle, this should effectively bring the situation to a close. The reality is that patent infringement cases like this pop up from time to time, and victory seems rare. [Vizio via Electronista]

It's a half-baked idea, of course, which is why we're only seeing it in a patent and not in actual hardware. Unless the half-keyboards were incredibly strong, the whole device would feel like it's itching to break into pieces, and wouldn't it have to be twice as thick as standard QWERTY sliders to accommodate double the amount of hardware? So it's just a patent, and it'll almost certainly stay that way. But at least somebody's trying to figure out a way to keep hardware keyboards alive. [Reg Hardware]

The fingerprint ID also, of course, can theoretically act as a security device so that only you can activate your phone. There's also haptic (physical) feedback when you're hitting things, as well as using the touchscreen as an RFID reader. None of the three are really mindblowing in themselves, on the surface, but if implemented intelligently might make for a big step forward in the iPhone product line. [Macrumors via Boy Genius]

Scheduled Communications
"A communications device may be programmed to initiate a communications operation when a particular condition is met. The user may set any suitable condition, including for example a date and time, location, event, received or sent communications operation..."
In other words, automatically email grandma on her birthday, or automatically send your wife a text message when you land in another state "I'm sorry honey, I'm seeing someone else...please pack up my clothing neatly and ship it to me."

Intelligent and Customizable Communication
"The communications system can provide intelligent communications between devices, in which the system can identify appropriate communication modes for incoming communications requests based on a user's preferences and availability. The communications system can determine whether a user is participating in an activity. In response to determining that a user is participating in an activity, the communications system can automatically identify one or more preferred communication modes that are available to the user."
In other words, if I'm at the gym (tracked by my location) or running from the cops (tracked by the jostling of my iPhone since my GPS is off), my family and friends can see that I'd prefer text messages instead of calls.

Life Event Based Modes
"One or more event-based modes of operation may be automatically or selectively applied to the device when a new life event is detected...The event-based modes of operation may be used to restrict access to certain applications or functionalities on the device, enforce or restrict certain user interface or other types of settings, and add or remove or rearrange the priority of device assets. The new life events associated with event-based modes of operation may be of various types, including location-based events, environment-based events, calendar-based events, news-based events, and usage-based events."
In other words, if you walk into a movie theater, your phone could automatically deactivate the ringer and text message notifications, plus it might turn off all push notifications to save some battery life while you weren't actively using your iPhone. Combined with a patent above, potential callers could even see that since you were at a movie, maybe they should delay the call, wait for you in the theater's alley and then threaten you, at knife-point, that you never should have taken out a loan you couldn't pay back just to buy a stupid iPhone.

I'll take it all, Apple. Thanks. [Unwired View]

Gates is one of many names on the patent from Searete LLC, the company you may recognize behind another recent Gates-signed work, an electromagnetic engine.

Apparently the new invention is not quite a keg or thermos, but a system that "may include more segments principally defining at least one storage region; and one or more regions of substantially thermally sealed connections between at least one of the one or more surface regions of the one or more segments wherein the one or more regions of substantially thermally sealed connections and the one or more segments form an integrally thermally sealed storage region."

In its simplest terms, that sounds a lot like a thermos wrapped in many layers of specialty insulation complete with sensors and displays—the ultimate beer home. And indeed, the patent app describes a container that could hold everything from a "liquid or beverage" such as "beer or distilled spirits" to artificial plasma and hot mix asphalt.

Nice attempt to hide international beer trade under philanthropic construction and medical uses, Señor Gates. But we're on to you. [Patent via TechFlash]

Specifically it's for "making selected portions and functionality of the operating system unavailable to the user or by limiting the user's ability to add software applications or device drivers to the computer" until an "agreed upon sum of money" is paid to unlock everything.

You likely have little to fear from it, however—since filing for this patent in 2005, Microsoft's consistently moved toward being less annoying, even to pirates.

Still it's interesting to read the patent to see how Microsoft thought through the problem of locking down an open architecture. (You can leave your "What? They patented BSoDs?" quips at the door, BTW, since I already took care of that.) [USPTO via Slashdot]

With these kiosks, consumers on the run would be able to browse selective, popular media—such as new releases—and purchase then download the content into the handhelds after swiping their credit card. Although it sounds quite simple, means of getting the content into the actual handheld could prove to be quite difficult as device connectors could be worn down or tampered with, and Wi-Fi hotspots could get hacked or overloaded. [iPodnn]

The new patent describes a morphing interface that will adapt to the motion of the user. For example, if you are in a shaky bus, the elements on a list will get bigger so you can target them better with your fingers. In the patent, the drawings depict a front-facing video camera that—if implemented—will enable the possibility of having face-to-face real-time communications between two iPhone users or—hopefully—one iPhone user and a desktop iChat user. And yes, with "face-to-face real-time communications" we really mean video sex. [MacRumors]

The patent shows that the iPod's new casing will be carved out of a single, large and thick block of sheet metal, making the device lighter, thinner and sturdier. Although it may be a significantly stronger product, with it being made out of one slab of metal, it seems that it would be harder to take the iPod apart for second-hand replacements and repairs, meaning that consumers would have to turn to Apple directly for all their iPod needs.

However, having it made out of one block of sheet metal would reduce the costs of creating it. Does this also mean it'll be cheaper for consumers as well? Please, Apple, let it be so. [iPodNN]

The original iChat AV answering machine patent was filed in October 2007, and detailed ways of iChat (or the iChat server) playing back an automated video or audio message when the user can't be reached. What's cool about this is that it's not that useful for computer to computer calling, but very useful for iPhone to computer calling, or computer to iPhone calling. When an iPhone user is out of range, or if a computer isn't on, it's convenient to know within, say, 10 seconds, instead of waiting there and wasting your phone's battery.

Plus, if there is video recording in iPhone 3.0, you may be able to record your messages directly on the phone itself. Bad ass (if true). [Macnn]

Following in the footsteps of Sony Ericsson, Apple doesn't seem to be satisfied with just the ability to switch between landscape and portrait orientations or simple screen-tilting in games. Just to name a couple of examples, with more gesture controls, you could switch between different webpages with a slight tilt, or change songs by shaking the gadget. That sounds pretty cool and all, but how will that work with my allergies? Sneeze or song change? Apple won't know. [Unwired View]

Let's see here, we've got a custom wallpaper, that's not allowed. We've got the Installer and SMBPrefs apps, you're not going to find either of those in the Officially Apple-Controlled Apple-Permitted App Store By Apple. Update: So after reading, it turns out that this image is actually illustrating a point, and isn't a mistake. The patent explains that it covers all uses of the iPhone, including a customized background and other bonuses available to the Jailbreak community. This is interesting in itself; Apple seems to be at the least permitting Jailbreaking enough to cover it in a patent. [Engadget, thanks Travis!]

The most realistic and likely biometric tool is a hidden sensor within a touchscreen or notebook's trackpad that would detect fingerprints, vein patterns or even the shape of your ear when you use the phone or notebook like normal, making the whole process nearly invisible. The patent also considers face recognition using the webcam—but considering our past experience with VeriFace's tech and iPhoto's face recognition, that sounds kinda lousy. The "ew, creepy" solution they propose is collecting a user's DNA to recognize their genetic makeup when they come into contact with the machine.

Oh and there's a couple ideas like arranging shapes or patterns that are sorta Android's neato puzzle lock. [AppleInsider]

The patent describes several forms for these displays-most of them already in use in current Apple laptops-, describing displays attached to portable computers. However, one of the claims describes the display as a "housing for a computer device", which would include the computer electronics within the display housing, sandwiched between front and back shells.

[0015]As a housing for a computer device, one embodiment of the invention includes: a front shell; a back shell coupled to said front shell to produce said housing, electrical components for the computer device being internal to said housing; and a foam stiffener provided internal to said housing to substantially fill unused space internal to said housing, thereby providing stiffness to said housing.

According to our patent expert R. Polk Wagner, Professor of patents law at University of Pennsylvania Law School:

What might be fair to say is that Apple's patent is significant in that it shows something about the company's thinking: that they are thinking about "portable computing devices" where the display (and/or keyboard) are larger than the volume required to house the components inside - thus allowing or even requiring a stiffener. Maybe this means Apple is thinking about tablets (i.e., "big iPhones") or maybe they're just thinking about further miniaturization of components / lighter weight in existing form factors. Hard to know.

So there you have it. To me, the patent claim quoted above leans clearly to a potential tablet device. In any case, remember that patents don't have to materialize into products, but it's always comforting to see Apple thinking about creating such a device. Or at least, contemplating the possibility seriously enough to cover all bets in a patent. [USPTO via Electronic Pulp]

The patent indicates that the levels could adjust based on user preferences and the presence of headphones. It might even be able to sense an echo in the room and suggest a switch to headphones or even cancel out the effect by changing its sound output. So far, there is no indication that Apple plans on doing anything with this technology, but as far as I'm concerned, it would be a welcome extension to the ambient light sensors they already use. [Patent Office via Electronista]