Please attempt to, well, fit in a bit better, then we will see what we can do about granting you the required access.

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But goddammit! You know I can't resist you baby. Now get your sweet moneymaker over here. Don't worry, my lappie doesn't burn.

I'd like to thank everyone whose made these two years and 10,000 comments wonderful.

Thanks to Brian Lam and Jesus Diaz and Jason Chen and Adam Frucci and Wilson Rothman and Mark Wilson and even Ginger. And to all of the editors, past present and future.

For all the commenters:

Thank you all for all the shenanigans. Thanks to Buick and SteveDave and Kaiser and Nut and Curves and LindsayJoy. I love you all so much that I'm trying to give you seizures.

Also, thanks to Bosskev and Jrsy and Nick and all the other up-and-comers.



I'll let you all stop seizing just long enough. If I haven't named you, it's just because I don't remember your name right this second.

Thanks to everyone at Gizmodo, both editors and commenters.

And if you haven't started commenting yet, remember that the history of 10,000 comments starts with just one snark; don't waste it on FIRST.

To another 10,000 comments and another two years!

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(Nice work.)

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You see how he treats me. He posted his first 8 hours before me and he thinks he's all that and an order of tostones.

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And yet I've been 15% less productive than you have over that same time frame.

Well, at least here. Not sure if that actually translates to being 15% more productive in the real world or not.

(I'm going to go with not.)

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I started out slow but am working steadily towards my 10,000. Granted the bulk of my comments were/are nowhere near as epic as yours but then again I am a man of few words anyways..

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i am sooo bookmarking this thread now. OMG!

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It's a secret. If we told you then we'd have to kill ya. Just kidding See below:

[gizmodo.com]

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Ponies, we live in a world that has walls and those walls need to be guarded by men with comments. Who's gonna do it? You? You, OMG! Ponies!? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You celebrate your 10,000 and parade the to years; you have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that the Facebook war, while tragic, probably saved commenters and that my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like snark,comment code, sarcasm. We use them as the backbone of a life trying to defend something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very comments section I provide and then forgets my name on his 10,000th. I would rather you just said "thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest that you pick up a keyboard and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

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A life lived without passion, is a life not lived at all. Congrats on your milestone, my ham loving friend.

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Ladies and gentleman, that right there is what we call a slow pitch right over the middle. Take it or leave it

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Ponies can drink seamen under the table!

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WE NEED A PREVIEW BUTTON!

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I had the honor of knocking back a few beers with a group of men with the cajones to put their lives on the line for their country. I talk a big game but these men live it. We got pissed, played darts, and ogled the slutty barmaids.

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Last I checked, Ponies was going to the spa every week, buying new clothes at the fanciest stores, ignoring his best friends and siblings, wearing a reverse mullet, ignoring his children, and sleeping with his bodyguard.

Well, at least that's what they said in US Weekly.

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While Ponies! can control the output from Ponies! Central and Team! Ponies!, there is little he can do about reference, quotation, and adulation from other sources. Rather than obsess about his iconic status or quotes like the one in this morning's NYT that referred to him as "one of the most original, compelling and, in a certain sense important commenters to come along in a generation," he simply goes about his life as he always has. He wakes up, he eats bacon, he goes to work, and he comments.

He would like me to remind you how very much he enjoys commenting, and how delighted he is that others appreciate his efforts. While he would prefer to have a little more privacy at movie theaters and restaurants, he understands that attention comes with the territory, and he owes much to his followers.

He would like me to assure you that he in no way expects his ongoing work on "Commenting on Helena," the much anticipated sequel to "Boxing Helena" to interfere with his output. At the same, as we ramp up for the introduction of the OMG! Cellphone! during the OMG! WWDC! next week, he would like me to remind you that he comments from a very full plate, and he appreciates your patience.

In the meantime, he hopes everyone enjoys the quote republished above which we have authenticated as an original OMG! Ponies! quote. As the team leader of quality control at OMG! Poniesworld! quipped at a recent meeting, like a fine wine or a cheap pizza, some of these damn comments are even better the day after!

And with that, on behalf of OMG! Ponies!, Ponies! Central!, and all of us here at Team Ponies!, thank you, Nameste, and good luck!

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only my very close friends know my nuts, and they're all girls.

"they probably already know your nuts,"

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