To me, it looks like an alien hockey puck, or maybe a massive, smoothed out sweet tart. But here's the actual idea:

Reminiscent of a condom shape warped into the surface of one's leather wallet, the NYC Condom's approachable shape and friendly brand helps create an air of openness and acceptance, thus removing the stigma of the condom as something to be ashamed off.

(No, this is not that crappy Ukranian knockoff.) Yes, Paul Lyons can proudly tell the world he owns a patent for "a chip-controlled piezoelectric sound transducer which plays a melody or voiced message when during intercourse the contacts of the sound-playing unit are closed and the transducer is activated." It's all about free love—you can record whatever music or sound you want, be it "Danger Zone" or "Thriller." I shudder at the possibilities.

Amazingly, it's never actually been produced. Idolator brings this gadget abortion back into the spotlight because they actually want this thing to happen probably because they're all depressed over there, awaiting the arrival of the Four Horsemen.

Sigh, so I kind of have to ask as much as every atom of my being is telling me not to: What would your (or your partner's) cocktone be if this small gateway to hell landed on your nightstand? Goddamnit. [Inventor Spot via Idolator]

The case is a centimeter thick, and slides open like a a cellphone with the rubber ready to go, preventing drunken Knocked Up moments. The packaging setup's aesthetically well-endowed too, with a ring of condoms surrounding the case, which looks sorta like if Apple designed contraceptives. On other hand, most Apple products now come with color options other than white, and the limited palette's a downer. Where's the neon? [Yanko Design]

An ultrasonic or laser-based distance sensor, and an infrared ray temperature sensor installed around the speaker of the phone measures the distance of the phone to your ear and the temperature inside your eardrum. Then, software inside the phone processes the measurements and transforms them into BBT records, before recommending that, yes, you can have hot, crazy rumpo with no consequences, or yes, you've got a chance of making Junior if you get busy tonight.

It's not a bad idea, given that a lot of women would rather lose a leg than be separated from their mobile, but how are Samsung going to market this? Presumably not, as we have, as a safe-sex phone, as it's won't protect from STDs.

Here's a bit of the patent application, but be warned that the word menstruation is used repeatedly in it.

[0089] Referring to FIGS. 2 and 7, as shown in FIG. 7, the information control unit 218 may display the user's generated menstruation information, e.g. fertile period information, on the display unit 219 of the portable device, i.e. on a screen of the portable device in a form of a calendar. Also, the information control unit 218 may display a graph 720 in which the user's menstruation information is indicated in each color. In the graph 720, a black interval 711 indicates a menstruation period, a green interval 712 indicates an infertile period, a yellow interval 713 indicates a pregnancy possibility period, and a red interval 714 indicates a fertile period.

Also, when the menstruation starting day is not inputted by the user, the information control unit 218 may provide the user with an alarm to induce the user to check for pregnancy.

What I want to know is, if you use your girlfriend's cell to take a call, do you completely bork the calendar, or does it bust you as being in possession of a penis and shut down? [Unwiredview]