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New York, 10:32 AM
Mon Nov 16
16 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #smooth more →

    Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never

    Scientists Create Smoothest Mirror Surface Ever

    Pick Up Line Generator: Worry Not Awkward Geeks, Gadgets Can Get You Laid
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    Image of jcrockerman jcrockerman
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    Image of MyPetFly MyPetFly
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    "...Which is Never"


    Batteries not required.

     Reply
    MyPetFly was starred MyPetFly was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    @MyPetFly: Oh they are required, just not for the alarm.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of theblackdog_FeelingRandom theblackdog_FeelingRandom
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    This looks like something you put on the door of the really nerdy guy in the dorm that you know isn't getting any.


    Or throw it on your parents door just to freak your brothers out *evil grin*

     Reply
    theblackdog_FeelingRandom was starred theblackdog_FeelingRandom was unstarred
    Image of Geisrud Geisrud
    11/06/08

    @theblackdog: Or put on your brother's door to freak out your parents.
     Reply
    Geisrud was starred Geisrud was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    But, pretty much there's no reason you need this if you're doing your duty by pleasing that booty.
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Curves Curves
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    So what are the odds of a college roommate walking in during that specific 30 second time frame.
     Reply
    Curves was starred Curves was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    11/06/08

    @Curves: Judging from Murphy's Law that would be the exact time frame someone would attempt entry to the room...
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Kaiser-Machead Kaiser-Machead
    11/06/08

    @Curves: There's always the mooch factor. By my calculations, the odds of a moochy roommate entering your room within a specific 30 second time frame is 6:1.
     Reply
    Kaiser-Machead was starred Kaiser-Machead was unstarred
    Image of Dirk Dirk
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    The sign I had in college said "Be Back In 5 Minutes"....
     Reply
    Dirk was starred Dirk was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    @Dirk: Bare Back In 5 Minutes?
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    11/06/08

    @Dirk: 5 minutes??


    Oh right, sorry I forgot that includes 3 minutes for undressing/redressing...

     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Ibelieveinsandwitches Ibelieveinsandwitches
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    advertising that you are doing the deed is a great way to get people to mess with you while you are doing it. especially in a dorm.


    Freshman are so barbaric.

     Reply
    Ibelieveinsandwitches was starred Ibelieveinsandwitches was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    @Ibelieveinsandwitches: We had a guy who had a squeaky bed in my one dorm. We left him some wd-40, but he never took the hint. We then started timing the squeaking and posting the results. Stopped soon after.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    @Git Em SteveDave loves this guy-->: My god! It's 4-4 time!
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    @Lite: Sweet, Young Einstein reference!
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    First of all, I don't have a roommate; I have a live-in girlfriend.


    Second, she knows when I'm having sex with her.

     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of mhlaxp mhlaxp
    11/06/08

    @OMG! Ponies!: Still might not be a bad idea to get one. What if you're with someone else? She'd sure be pissed if she walked in on it, and this helpful device could prevent that.


    I'm sure that would save your relationship.

     Reply
    mhlaxp was starred mhlaxp was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    11/06/08

    @mhlaxp: And this is why she is supposed to call when she's on her way home.
     Reply
    OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    @mhlaxp: You mean the part where she grabs the fire axe and goes postal after hearing that thing go off?
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    11/06/08

    @mhlaxp: Ah, but if he was with someone else and she walked in, she may also wish to partake in the activities as well...
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    I don't think I need one of these.


    I mean...they would hear me anyways through the door.

     Reply
    LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M was starred LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    @LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M (it takes after its mistress): You would think they would hear the whip cracks first. After all, they are sonic booms.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    @LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M (it takes after its mistress): Is that because of the cracking of the flogger as it strikes skin, or because of you screaming in a faux german accent?
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Kaiser-Machead Kaiser-Machead
    11/06/08

    @LindsayJoy's MBP is into S+M (it takes after its mistress): I'm a tie-on-the-doorknob guy myself, but anything that prevents the need of goofy, single-purpose novelty gadgets is always a big help :D
     Reply
    Kaiser-Machead was starred Kaiser-Machead was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    11/06/08

    @Lite: "Have you been in any German scheisse videos?"
     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    It should play 'Bow-chicka-wow-wow' instead.


    Or the theme from 'Shaft'.


    Or Quagmire saying, 'Giggidy, giggidy, goo."

     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Mayor McRib Mayor McRib
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    Will this also work for the bathroom door?
     Reply
    Mayor McRib was starred Mayor McRib was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    You would hope you were doing a good enough job that your partner would let everyone in a 50 foot radius know they were "gettin' some".

    I personally don't need this, as people can just check my cams out to see if I'm crying, being consoled by a lady, who's telling me, "It happen to a lot of guys."
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of zero411 zero411
    11/06/08

    @Git Em SteveDave loves this guy-->: At least you have a lady.


    So if I put this on my door when I'm "spanking my monkey", Does anyone think this will create the illusion that I'm getting laid?

     Reply
    zero411 was starred zero411 was unstarred
    Image of GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked
    11/06/08

    @zero411: I wish I had a lady. The only thing you'll see on my cams is me, my cats, and my dog.
     Reply
    GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was starred GitEmSteveDave_Isn'tFreshPerked was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    @zero411: Self love, is still getting laid.
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Jrsy Devil's Advocate® Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
    11/06/08

    @zero411: It might fool them at first but I think eventually they'll figure it out.


    At that point they'll just point and snicker amongst themselves everytime you string up your spank alarm..

     Reply
    Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was starred Jrsy Devil's Advocate® was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    Or you know, just G loud enough that there's no question what's going on inside.
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of dingus dingus
    11/06/08

    @Lite: Throw the locks so they can't clock but they can listen. There'll be no bargin' in and there'll be no dissin'.
     Reply
    dingus was starred dingus was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    @dingus: That's Check the locks, because a true freak of the industry always locks the door first.
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    11/06/08

    In reply to Sex Alert Announces When You're Having Sex, Which is Never
    Yeah, I'll just stick w/ the college standby about the surf being up on the cuyahoga on the whiteboard.
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
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