Gizmodo: spring cleaning

DBAG Results: 20-25 - Dirty Bastard

Adam Frucci — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

Alright, you have a problem. You're lazy to a fault. You have constant, greasy bedhead, you have that thick, sour odor about you that comes from a lack of proper hygiene, and people are frightened to go near your desk for fear of a ferret or other rodent-like creature jumping out. You're lazy to such an extreme that it's wrecking your life. People think you're some sort of eccentric, but you're really just a dirty bastard. Is it really worth it, friend?

DBAG Results: 16-20 - Pretty Sloppy

Adam Frucci — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

OK, so you're a bit of a slob. You wear the same shirt multiple days in a row if it passes the smell test, and you refer to your workspace as "organized chaos." Sure, it may look like a bomb went off, but you know where everything is. It's a very elaborate system, you swear! Your parents are worried that you'll never get married because no one would be able to deal with your messiness, but you're convinced it's not that bad.

DBAG Results: 11-15 - Middle of the Road

Adam Frucci — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

You just go with the flow. You clean up after yourself periodically, but things can get kind of messy sometimes. You don't prefer disorganization, but you can also handle it when it occurs. You don't have the cleanest bedroom in the world, but the chances are good that your music collection is pretty well organized. Well, maybe not the genre tags.

DBAG Results: 6-10 - Keeps It Tidy

Adam Frucci — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

You're very organized, but not so much that you can't work without your pens being perfectly parallel on your desk. You just don't like clutter or disorganization, which is pretty damned admirable. You were the kind of kid who cleaned your room for fun, much to the pleasure and possibly confusion of your parents.

DBAG Results: 0-5 - Neat Freak

Adam Frucci — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

You're not just neat and organized, you have full blown OCD. Sure, your desktop is organized, but you also wash your hands 50 times a day and can't sleep without checking to make sure your alarm is set a half dozen times. Your obsession with neatness has translated into a lifetime of anxiety and tension. Sucks for you!

Take the DBAG: The Dirty Bastard Aptitude Geek Quiz

Adam Frucci — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:00:00 EDT

Are you an unorganized, sloppy mess, or do you keep yourself neat, clean and together? Take the DBAG to find out once and for all just how much of a disaster you are.

To take the test, simply read the following 25 questions and keep track of how many times you answer "yes." At the end, we'll be able to tell you just how gross you are based on this number. Now pay attention!

The DBAG
1. Do you eat Cheetos at your keyboard without wiping your hands?
2. Do you have over 30 desktop icons that are completely unorganized?
3. Do you have every photo your digital camera has ever taken on your computer, even the ones with your finger on the lens, just because you're too lazy to delete them?
4. Are half of your MP3s tagged incorrectly or not tagged at all?
5. Do you have tons of people in Facebook purgatory who you don't want to accept but are too lazy to deny?
6. Do you have over 1,000 unread messages in your Gmail inbox?
7. Do you not have a protective screen on your phone?
8. Do you use your computer on the toilet?
9. Do you still have floppy disks kicking around your workspace for some reason?
10. Do you have bookmarks that you last visited over 5 years ago?
11. Is your address book full of duplicate entries for different people like a 2001 cellphone?
12. Do you have a closet that's full of empty gadget boxes in a big pile?
13. Do you have a ball of tangled cables that you're pretty sure you'll never be able to get untangled?
14. Is there a "Install AOL Now!" icon still on your desktop from when you bought it?
15. Do you have a drawer full of old installer CDs and manuals that's completely disorganized?
16. Are all of your photos in one big folder that you need to sort through to find what you're looking for?
17. Do you use the iPhone's remote app to change the music on your computer when you're sitting less than 5 feet away?
18. Do you have shows on your DVR that have been automatically recording for months, yet you never watch?
19. Do you have unopened bank statement envelopes on your desk from over a year ago?
20. After a phone call, do you need to wipe a good amount of facegrease off with your shirt?
21. Do you have more than 3 toolbars installed in your browser?
22. Do you have more than a half dozen mystery processes you haven't bothered to investigate that automatically start up when you boot your computer?
23. Are you subscribed to multiple email lists that you always delete without reading but are too lazy to unsubscribe from?
24. Do you have an entire bagel's worth of poppy/sesame seeds under the keys of your keyboard?
25. Do you ever go out of the house looking like this guy?

Now tally up how many of these questions you answered yes to and click below for your diagnosis and analysis.

Score:
-0-5 points
-6-10 points
-11-15 points
-16-20 points
-21-25 points

Crave more analysis of your various foibles? Check out our other quizzes:
-GSAT: The Geek Social Aptitude Test
-The 50 Skills Every Geek Should Have

10 Storage Gadgets That Will Help You Lose The Clutter

Sean Fallon — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 16:00:00 EDT

It's that time of year again guys—time to clean up and de-clutter. If you obsessively accumulate crap, Spring cleaning can be a daunting task. These gadgets can help you get organized.

[Images via Flickr and BlueQ]

Good Lord, You People Are All Slobs

Adam Frucci — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 15:20:00 EDT

This week, I asked you to send me in photos of your disastrous workspaces. And man, you people are much, much more disgusting than I thought. And I assumed you were pretty disgusting.

First Place — David Schaefer
Second Place — Grossi Roberta
Third Place — Dudesque

13 Spring Cleaning Tips for Your Home Theater

Sean Fallon — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 21:00:00 EDT

Step 1: Get a maid.

This may be your first instinct when it comes to cleaning anything in your home, but it is not an option that is available to everyone. When it comes home theater gear, this is probably a good thing because cleaning it improperly can do damage—and I'll be dammed if I'm trusting anyone else with my precious gadgets. Fortunately, Sound and Vision has come up with 13 tips for TVs, speakers, media players, and connectors to help you get the job done safely. Hit the link for the full list. [Sound and Vision]